A
male
age
36-40,
*rOveranalysing
writes:I've been close friends with this girl for a year, recently we've become involved with each other (kissing, hugging etc.) over a ten day period romance. She is seeing this guy, who never calls her and doesn't return her calls over a three week (period), she's says his mother is dying, but surely thats no excuse to ignore your close friend/girlfriend. Previously, she told me that she wanted to break up with him and under this impression I went along with the fling, in the hope it would develop into more. However, now she has become unsure again and said she needs to speak to him, she hasn't given me any time span of when she will give me a response. Additionally, she said she knew in my situation she would feel 'mad' and she doesn't mean to mess me around. I'm attached to her and I don't really know where this leaves me. What would be the confident and mature way to deal with this situation? Take into account i have had very limited experience in relationships. Hell I'm paranoid she is clocking on to my vulnerability.
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Fancy yourself as an agony aunt? Add your answer to this question! A
female
reader, Minelisse  +, writes (22 May 2008):
 She seems to be really confused and interested in not hurting you. However, in this situation she has a very high possibility of doing so. Sit down with her and talk, tell her how you feel and what your expectations are. Ask how she feels and how you might help in the process.
If she continues to have feelings for this other person, the possibilities of you getting hurt are high. We cannot choose who we feel something for, so she is not toying with you. You, on the other hand, are responsible for you decisions and if you decide to stay then so be it knowing the possibilities of getting hurt and/or of winning her over. It is a gamble. Best of lucks!
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