| A
female
,
anonymous
writes: Please help. When I first met my boyfriend, it was hearts and flowers. I've since discovered that he can be critical, impatient, judgemental and school teacherish. He has a temper and doesn't cope well with stress.I stand up to him now (didn't use to) but he has told me he doesn't want to change and he doesn't have the time. He wants me to change (he says I don't drop subjects,moans too much) and he has said he has been trying to get rid of me for months.He can be warm, loving,caring but he has another side to him. I do a lot for him and am always willing to change to help the relationship.I'm not sure he would even miss me, though, if I left. He tells me he loves me up to an extent but inside I feel I am crying.Please help.
View related questions:
flowers Reply to this Question
Share |
Fancy yourself as an agony aunt? Add your answer to this question! A
female
reader, Bev Conolly  +, writes (27 November 2005):
 Even if this man hasn't told you in precise words that he's no longer interested in your being together - and please note that he has - he's showing the classic indicators of a control freak.
Consider: he was lovely to you until he felt you were under his "spell", then he started demanding that YOU change to suit him. Then he said he doesn't "have time" to change his behaviour (like being pleasant is a much slower process than being judgemental?!) - although he obviously believes that you do have that time.
What sort of nonsense is that?
Congratulations for gathering your dignity and standing up for yourself, but you've already seen that he's just playing you. There's no real love in him. In fact, he's grinding you under his heel. Stick around and you'll REALLY learn to hurt.
If I was you, I'd leave without looking back... and consider this a lesson in the type of man to avoid in future.
Good luck and take care.
A
female
reader, shania  +, writes (27 November 2005):
 Im afraid this relationship has died a death.You two are not compatable.Didnt he say that he has been trying to get rid of you for months? Charming! Why are you still with him? I get the impression that he likes talking down to you.Why do you have to be the one to change the relationship? He isnt.My dear,i suggest you leave him and find some other man who will appreciate you for who you are.This other man of yours is nothing more then a jumped up bully.LEAVE!
...............................
A
male
reader, smartoldman +, writes (27 November 2005):
WHY are you still with him them? You just said he said that he has been trying to get rid of you for months. Say bye and move on. someone who loves you for you will find you and you them.
...............................
|
