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female
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*eatherg
writes: I want to do something special for my husbands birthday... I can count the number of times that we have had sex on one hand in the last year, and if I use both hands thats about how many times we have in the past 18 months. I'm really confused about this we are both young, and we don't have any children. He always has an excuse. Recently I asked him and he said that he feels like he's fighting for my attention with of all things our dog. I'm just lost for words. So I have arranged for a dog sitter on the weekend of his birthday, and want to do something special, just the two of us, and see what happens then. Any suggestion would be great on how to make him want me again.Thanks- Heather Reply to this Question
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female
reader, anonymous, writes (9 October 2007): i do totally understand what you mean, but by the sounds of things it sounds like your dog maybe is the i most important thing to you, i need to make it clear to him that u are human and that it is him u want, i mean he had got 2 be feeling pretty bad having to compete with a dog. dont try to push things on him either he obviousl misses wht you to used to have maybe before the dog was around, just take things slow talk to him dont make sex the answer as at the end of the day u will have sex and then thing will go back to the way they were before hand, u need to try and solve problems for the long term not just the short term, try a romantic dinner maybe with candles the lot and try tounderstand his point of vew in everything.
good luck and have fun
all the best miriam xx
A
female
reader, dizzy blonde  +, writes (8 March 2007):
I know my man loves me undoubtably .... but does he still fancy me or am I just a port in a storm, so to speak.... he only ever has energy for sex when we are absolutely smashed, not just on alcohol,,,,,, if only drunk he takes the knock.... but I have to admeit sometimes I take knock on him too although not often.. I seem to be wanting it more than him and I am getting just a little bit worried or paranoid.... we both work equally as hard although as a nurse I have to work earlies, lates, nights and weekends as my shift pattern dictates, where as he works mon-fri 9-5. do I expect too much
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reader, Rebecca Batchelor +, writes (28 November 2005):
 The very first thing to do is ignore what Tim has said!(Trying to live out his fantasies through your problem!)Could be a classic way to make things worse!
Going out for a romantic meal and just relaxing together could be a good idea for his birthday. Nothing too demanding, just do something together that is relaxing for the both of you.
I think, though, there is a bit more of a problem here that does need addressing. It sounds very much like an excuse that he has given as to why your sex life is virtually non existent. AS you have said, he makes excuses which is covering up the real reason. He needs some help in resolving whatever difficulties he may have. Perhaps it is to do with performance worries or stresses at work or a very low sex drive. Whatever the reasons, unless he recognises what they are and tries to do something about it, your lack of love life will continue.
It is perhaps time to get him to either tell you honestly what the problems are or to suggest he seeks help from a professional to sort this out.
Talk to him as soon as you can and try to work through this together.
Good luck.
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A
male
reader, Tim +, writes (28 November 2005):
 HMMM Try to book a sexy eastern european girl prettier than youself for a surprise from an esscort angency to join you and give him more pleasure only for one night stand on his birthday make sure he isn't asking her for her phone number other will this will cost you ;)This will make the party more fun and he might not be able to walk tomorrow lol he will love one more girl to join be with u in his bed wot do u think? :) I want exactly something wot i m saying for my damn birthday ;) it will make me fly higher than i can imagine to touch the blue sky and bring a lil star from middle of sky ;)Happy birthday
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