A
female
age
36-40,
anonymous
writes:I have been seeing a guy for the last 6 months and in the beginning it was just meant to be a bit of fun. He was considered to be quite a player and when he started to pressure me I played along because I never thought it would turn into anything. 6 months later and I have put the poor guy through his paces, he has had to prove that he is no longer a man whore. He treats me very well. He is the funniest guy I have ever met, and I believe that he genuinely wants me. Problem is, I think that for someone to have been that much of a player in their past, they must have terrible morals deep down. Also I don't find him terribly attractive. Also my family hates him because he is a bit forward when it comes to any form of intimacy and they think he is just trying to break me down. I'm torn coz he has stood by me no matter how mean I got, and he is trying so hard - I don't believe that I will ever find a guy who I can talk to like I talk with him. But I don't see how a future can work, and I cant help but look at every guy I meet and compare them to him. I've thought about ending it, but I'm scared to throw something like this away when he has been so persistent, and he has done nothing in particular wrong to me to warrant an immediate break up. Please help. xo
View related questions:
player Reply to this Question
Share |
Fancy yourself as an agony aunt? Add your answer to this question! A
female
reader, iloveblue  +, writes (22 November 2011):
 I think this is the price for people who have had a history of being a player. I am also dating a guy who has been with so many chicks and slept with..i don't know how many, I just don't bother to ask him. They will find it very hard to earn your trust and sometimes their past is what makes them lose you.I have known my bf since 2009 and it took me a year to say yes to him to be his gf. I can't say I totally trust him, there are days I am scared he might catch up with his past, like go back to meeting new women again. But I see no clue at all, just my fear. He sense sometimes that I am haunted by his past and he always explains to me that i have changed him and that he is not the man he once told me about. Because he found me and that I should not be worried. I am the best girl he has ever met.I'd say, take it or leave it. He can't go back to undo all those stuff. If you can't live with it, leave him. If you love him enough, accept him.It is a process actually, it's not an overnight thing that you can overcome. But you will get there in time.
A
female
reader, Sexy babe1980  +, writes (22 November 2011):
I date a player and he change we being togerther for nine years and being married for 3year if you love him give him ago. Because players can change all it take is the right women. Good luck
...............................
A
reader, anonymous, writes (22 November 2011): It started out like you were some Kick Ass Chick that wasn't about to be played but then ended that you were a chica that is about to be played.
The thing about a Player or a Serial Cheater- they want what they want and they will do all they can to get it. Right now you are in his sights.
If you KNOW and BELIEVE he is not worth your time- why did you give him it?
If you have been intimate with this guy; then well, no wonder you think you may be in love with him.
Trust your Family but more importantly, trust in yourself.
Cut the guy loose. Do normal activities and hang with family and friends to get this guy out of the system and THEN move on.
...............................
A
female
reader, cupid2468  +, writes (22 November 2011):
 I am dating a guy that also used to be a little bit of a player. What you need to do is talk to him and express your concerns about his past and have a real heart to heart talk about it. He may have actually changed. The thing with players is, yeah they get around, but once they find what they want they do everything in their power to keep it. Maybe you are what he wants.And with your family not liking him, maybe they just need a real chance to get to know him. They will come around. But also keep in mind, most of the time your family is right. You may not want to admit it, but they have your best interest at heart. While your judgement may be clouded because of your lust or love for this guy, they are looking at things with a clear mind. So take what they say into consideration but dont let them make the decision for you.The attraction thing, is just something that you can maybe look past? If he is a great guy, and he is funny, and makes you happy, then looks really do not matter. Looks don't last forever. Hope this helps =)
...............................
|
