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He wants me to stop taking birth control and see what happens!

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Question - (29 December 2010) 2 Answers - (Newest, 30 December 2010)
A female United States age 41-50, anonymous writes:

I am 27 and am in a new relationship of 3 months with my boyfriend who is 26. We have known each other for years, hanging out with mutual friends every now and again through that time. I have always had something for him this whole time but whenever we hung out or ran into each other, one of us was in a relationship. We finally reconnected 4 months ago and began a relationship that is amazing so far. We both have an amazing connection that we never had with anyone before and we both are pretty serious about each other. I also have a 4 yr old from a previous relationship and he is great with her. She is very weary of new people and has problems developing relationships with other adults, like my friends who have been in her life since birth, but she instantly took to my boyfriend. My boyfriend and I are wanting to move in together soon and have already talked about our future together, but recently we had a pregnancy scare and when we found out I wasn't, we were both disappointed. We are not trying to have a baby, but if it were to happen we both would be thrilled. And just the other day, we were discussing having kids and he mentioned that we maybe should stop using birth control and see what happens. Now, I would be thrilled to have another baby, especially with him, but is it crazy to want this so early in the relationship?

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A male reader, Honest Answer United States +, writes (30 December 2010):

Honest Answer agony auntIf you quit taking birth control and continue to have sex, I think we both know what will happen. Until you two commit to one another (exchange wedding vows) I think you better stay on the birth control.

I have a feeling that if you both really "We are not trying to have a baby, but if it were to happen we both would be thrilled," you wouldn't be here asking for advice.

I have a feling that this rekindled relationship will work, but you owe it to yourself and a possible baby, to do things right.

Good Luck!

Jeff

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A female reader, perch United States +, writes (30 December 2010):

Congratulations on finding a man you connect with and better yet, one your daughter likes! Its often said that during the first 6 months of a relationship that most couples are in the "blindly in love stage". Basically, what this means is most people are oblivious to one another's faults. This does not mean that you and your boyfriend could not make the relationship work and have a baby together in such a short period of time. However, it means approach with caution. Love is crazy. You're totally normal for feeling this way. I am guilty of the same thing and I'm sure there are plenty of other woman who've done the same. Good luck and hope it goes thw way you would like it to.

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