A
female
age
30-35,
anonymous
writes:i'm 15. i almost cheated on my bf with a guy who is also my very good friend. i told him straight about it and he forgave me . i dont want any lies in this relationship. i am still friends with this guy but there is NOTHING going on. now my bf wants me to delete him off my contact list and neva speak to him again. although he does have reason. is this fair? Reply to this Question
Share |
Fancy yourself as an agony aunt? Add your answer to this question! A
male
reader, maxsteel86  +, writes (12 March 2007):
 If you dont do it, it'll kill the trust in your relationship and eventually you and the boyfriend will break up over it.
If you do it, then you'll lose the friend you almost cheated with. And its true in most cases (maybe not all), when a guy has feelings other than friendship for a girl, they cant be just friends.
If you really have strong feelings for your boyfriend then I'd say go for the 1st choice. Your friend should have more decency than to try scoring with a girl who's clearly not available.
And yes its fair, just cos you didn't cheat in the end doesn't remove the fact that you were heading there. He's right to feel insecure now and you need to do something to help him restore faith in you
Not an easy choice I guess, but then neither was going to Iraq. A choice still needs to be made
A
female
reader, loveandlust +, writes (12 March 2007):
 just think about it if it was him that had almost cheated on you and he was still talking to the girl..you wouldnt like it so just think about how hes feeling he obv loves you other wise he wouldnt of forgive you..just think about him for a while and give your friend a wide birth and spend time with your boyfriend!
...............................
A
reader, anonymous, writes (12 March 2007): You are so young for this serious relationship stuff! Get out there and have a life. It is unfair for your bf to expect you to delete anyone's name from your list, no don't do it. Why should you be dictate to. This is a control situation and you shouldn't be controlled by someone who says they care for you. Keep friendships always. Boys may come and go but friends stay forever, male or female, so don't erase them at all. Tell your bloke to grow up or get lost.
Take care
xx
...............................
A
reader, anonymous, writes (12 March 2007): You are so young for this serious relationship stuff! Get out there and have a life. It is unfair for your bf to expect you to delete anyone's name from your list, no don't do it. Why should you be dictate to. This is a control situation and you shouldn't be controlled by someone who says they care for you. Keep friendships always. Boys may come and go but friends stay forever, male or female, so don't erase them at all. Tell your bloke to grow up or get lost.
Take care
xx
...............................
A
female
reader, Bella55 +, writes (12 March 2007):
Strictly speaking you didnt cheat on him. You almost, but you didnt. I think you have proven to your boyfriend that he can trust you. He shouldnt have these insecurities as you were honest enough to tell him what almost happened.
I dont think your boyfriend is being fair, mostly because youve confided in him. I would ask him to trust you and that nothing is happeneing and that nothing ever will. If there is no trust in a relationship, its not worth it. Oh and for next time, Dont tell your boyfriends you were about to cheat on them. Its called a white lie, and it sometimes it does more harm than not to them. What they dont know, wont hurt them. If you did actually cheat on him, that would be different and you would have to tell him. Dont be too honest, you can hurt your relationships more if you tell them everything.
...............................
A
female
reader, dragonette  +, writes (12 March 2007):
 Let's put it this way, technically it's maybe not right to dump a friend, but on the other hand if you keep contact with this guy he will always be between you and your boyfriend. Every time you go out with your friend your boyfriend is going to wonder if you're about to cheat on him and it's going to wear down the trust in the relationship.
Good friends don't grow on trees, and neither do good boyfriends. I don't think that you can have both people in your life, so make a choice and choose wisely.
...............................
|
