A
female
age
41-50,
*e81
writes:It's been so long, over a year and his image still in my memory and my heart... Is this love? He's with someone else now, if you read my old posts you know how the story goes... I'm seeing someone new now too, and he's a great guy but gosh! ... I cannot forget HIM! I'm trying to give it a chance to this new guy but I just feel like wasting my time, I don't feel what I still feel for Him... Theres no hope with Him, he has make up his mind and he's in a relationship now that seems to make him happy... As happy as I was never make him :( I'm happy for Him, I love to see him smile, I try not to see pictures of him and move on, but since 2 weeks ago I made the huge mistake of looking him up on fb and saw a picture of them together, geez that breaks my heart ... He's gone... And I keep telling myself, he's happy, let it go! You need to find your own happiness now! ... Still hard.... I've tried to just be alone and not date anybody, but when I'm alone it seems like I think about him even more, that's why I decided to give it a chance to this great guy and see where it goes:/ ... I have never had problems moving on from a breakup, once it was done, it was done... But with him, it's just so different, never felt like this before... And I'm divorced, and I was in love w my ex husband but it wasn't like this, it was so different. HE did play me good... He hurt my feelings more then anyone had before, and that's what bothers me the most, cuz he doesn't deserve what I still feel for him. ...
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female
reader, that's_me_tj  +, writes (2 June 2011):
I did the same!! LOL!! I even tried to make myself hate him at that time by picturing him kissing some other girl who's looks way better than me... I did cry every night then but trust me, it is not permanent. It needs time but how much time, that I can't say... But really, it's better not to waste your time, energy and tears while thinking of someone who doesn't care about all that anymore.. Instead give your time to someone who cares, and you'll be more than thankful. And i do know how you feel, cuz my guy was all crazy over me.... But when we broke up, I kept holdin on to the good times, while he was having some good time with someone else....
You will come through, stronger... Trust me... :)
A
female
reader, me81 +, writes (2 June 2011):
me81 is verified as being by the original poster of the question You guys are right... I'll try to enroll in those classes, salsa sounds fun! Ha ... He wasn't all bad... He was crazy about me at the beginning and I broke up with him twice out of impulse... It wasn't mayor things but it just got me mad enough to walk away from him... I guess back then didn't really realized how much he meant to me :( at that point he moved on and i was totally hooked ha. Every now and then I still cry at night feeling the pain thinking about him still causes me... Sometimes I wonder if I would ever hear from him again... I like to think that he's about to marry this girl he's with now lol so that keeps me from thinking about him...
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A
female
reader, lorinda +, writes (2 June 2011):
You know it's kind of sick but we all seem to want what we know we can't have. Why is this? We know the guy is no good for us...he doesn't treat us how we want to be treated...there is almost always some other woman in his life...but yet we are hooked. And all the while, the great guy standing right there in front of us gets overlooked. I think the problem lies within each of us thinking we can win them over. Then when we don't...we feel heartbroken. It's happened to me too but lately I'm not so sure that my sadness isn't in just the fact that I lost, and didn't get what I thought I wanted. In retrospect...he was kind of a jerk...wasn't what I would have ever picked so what the heck? Hate to say it but the easiest way to get over somebody is to find somebody else... they did! Once you start enjoying where you are at...and actually start living in the moment...you may be surprised how you start thinking about your lost love less and less!
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A
female
reader, that's_me_tj +, writes (1 June 2011):
Hey, that's okay to feel that way. Trust me, I had taken a really long time to get over a guy i loved way back in 2008 and I got over him when i kind of really screwed stuff up like my relations with friends, my school work eetc. etc. And i realised that i was the only one in the relationship who had been left behind, while that guy moved on long back. And i just decided to be strong and i fell in love, a stronger love with another guy who was perfect. but this guy was the one who showed his true colours a while later and treated me so bad, yet loved me and i still love him. I am trying to avoid him now, so that i can forget him. and i can't. SO i just keep myself busy now to stop myself from thinking about him to some extent. I enrolled in some classes, why don't you?? And spend more time having fun with your friends and this guy.. Why don't you take up something like salsa classes if you like dance, and take this new guy as a partner. It'll definitely do good to pep-up some new feelings for him in you... :)
And don't worry, you're not alone. I am sailing in the same boat as you!!
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