A
female
age
41-50,
anonymous
writes:Hi I have been with my fiance for 2 and half years, and im feeling very confused at the moment when I first met hime he told me about his past that he used to take herion, but assured me he was clean. He has now found out he has bipolar we are always arguring adn I can not keepm up with his mood swing, I have found so many syringes in the last year and he just keeps on making stories up. I dont know what to do anymore I love him very much but I cant live with lies anymore. He spends so much money and always struggling to pay bills because of his stupidity I am also getting that way I always check his phone becuase he says he is going to the shop for something and he goes for over two hours and brings back nothing I ask him about this and he just tells me They didnt have what he wanted but when I checked his phone there was a text message from a girl he used to work for saying can i see you tonight. Please help me I dont know what to do anymore
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male
reader, rcn  +, writes (17 May 2008):
 You seem like a nice person. You are willing to put up with this WHY? Unless he's a diabetic, or a doctor, I don't see any real excuse for his having syringes in his posession.
Heroin is an extremely dangerous and addictive drug. It changes the cellular structure to being a need and not just recreational. Sometimes people with bipolar use heroin as a method of self medicating, if untreated.
He's making up quite a few excuses to attempt justification for his actions. I would have to say, these exucses are a method of not taking responsability for his acitons. I believe if you stay with him, his excuses are going to write more and more chapters which boil down too his failure to take responsability.
A
female
reader, Aunt Audrey  +, writes (16 May 2008):
 You know in your heart this man is still in the grip of heroin addiction, he may not admit it but the syringes speak for themselves!
You will never change him, he has to want to help himself, you will however have to live with the consequences of drug abuse for it takes priority above anything else in his life, including you....He will lie to you, he will spend money you don't have, he will spin out when he needs a fix.
You need to be honest with yourself, take off your love goggles and ask yourself if this is what you want for your life? If not face reality and leave, tell him why and don't be fooled by his lies. If he insists it's all in your mind and that he is clean ask him to do a drugs test to prove it, if he loves you and wants to keep you he will agree.
He needs to clean up his life and he will need the strength and willpower to do it for himself, not for you or anyone else.
Living with this insecurity is no basis for a relationship I'm sure you are finding the situation unbearable, as hard as it may seem you could be so much happier if only you stop listening to all his bull and take control of your own life!
Good luck.x
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