| A
female
age
51-59,
anonymous
writes: Hi, my partner of ten years walked out on me when I was unwell about a year ago. We kept in touch and we talked all the time and he talked about getting back together. Then he suddenly switched on me. He has always complained about my size. I am roughly a size 16 and I was this size when he met me but I'm quite tall and medium build. I am not fat all over, just need to lose some weight in certain areas but actually look about a size 14. Anyhow, he suddenly told me, over the weekend, by text, in a nasty way, that he has met someone else and that he has 'good lean meat now'. Can anyone explain this behaviour? Why would he suddenly turn and go nasty like this. He has been verbally abusive to myself and his ex in the past. I was horrified and upset and hurt. Any comments would be appreciated.
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Fancy yourself as an agony aunt? Add your answer to this question! A
female
reader, anonymous, writes (16 February 2010): Forget him - don't let him abuse you! I had a friend who actually ended up with anorexia trying to please her boyfriend, who constantly picked on her about her weight. I remember one time when she had just been discharged from a treatment center for her anorexia, we went to her house (she lived with her boyfriend), and she was showing me a dress she had purchased - small size, just as she was (still being able to see bones protruding from the anorexia) - and her JERK boyfriend made a nasty remark that the dress looked like a size 20 -- He said this to her, knowing she was fighting anorexia!! Nobody, not her, not you, should be involved with a man who will only tear you down - ruining emotional and physical health. Consider it a blessing that this man is out of your life.
A
male
reader, CaringGuy  +, writes (15 February 2010):
Basically you unfortunately chose a guy who was an ass. He is an abuser of women. He abused his ex, and he has abused you. No doubt he will abuse this new woman too. Don't take it personally, because this isn't about you, it's about him. Cut all contact and never talk to him again. You can do better.
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A
female
reader, Caring Stranger +, writes (15 February 2010):
 firstly....there is nothing wrong with your size. be happy for who you are.
secondly....this guy doesnt sound like he has ever treated you right. He has always put you down about your size, walked out in you during illness and is now sending you nasty texts......you do not need this man in your life. He may be trying to make you jealous or he may jut be being nasty and spiteful. either way i think you will be better off without this man in your life. you deserve someone who is going to treat you with respect and love you for who you are, as you are.
do not let his nasty words get to you!
xxx
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