A
female
age
51-59,
anonymous
writes:I've just divorced and started a relationship with this man. I feel good when I am round him. We have sex three or four times a week. A year on he begins to struggle to satisfy me in bed as his back pain is getting worse. He takes painkiller and carry on with frequent sex with me. I am 45 and always love sex and he is 63. I love him and feel bad to see him in pain. I've talked to him about it but he just wouldn't bend. What can i do? Please advise.
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female
reader, Country Woman +, writes (8 March 2008):
 Have you ever got to the route of what is wrong with your man's back as living on pain killers is never the real answer to problems, also having sex 3 - 4 times a week is good for a lot of people I would say.
So be grateful that you get it that often, ask many couples how often they have sex and if they are young with no children the ratio is normally higher.
Over a certain age though things tend to slow down, you are in the height of your sexual life so that is fine, however you need to really get to the root of what is your man's back problem and perhaps suggest some physio or osteopathic treatments or maybe massage it could be arthritic pain or disc problems or anything so it is hard to know what the real remedy should be.
I have lived with back pain now since I was 30 when they discovered I had osteoarthritis and one or two of my discs are just none existent and the vertebrae are basically rubbing together. Some days the pain is fine and others it is horrendous. Weight is never good for someone who has a back problem but too much exercise can also aggravate it as well. Perhaps talking to his doctor with you would give you more of a chance to understand what is going on.
He is 63 at the end of the day so there is quite an each gap here and he may have lived quite a different lifestyle over the years and damaged his back badly in some way.
Hope some of the above helps.
BFN
Country Woman
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