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Why do the insensitive say they never meant any harm by their actions?

Tagged as: Big Questions, Cheating, Troubled relationships<< Previous question   Next question >>
Question - (8 March 2008) 2 Answers - (Newest, 8 March 2008)
A female Canada, anonymous writes:

I have a question which has always troubled me. Why is it that people who are insensitive to the feelings of others...we all know them..the womanisers, cheaters etc always say they never meant any harm to anyone when you call them on it. Are they really that dense about their insensitivity or is it just denial on their part so they will not feel guilty.

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A female reader, anonymous, writes (8 March 2008):

People who hurt others and then say 'oh I never meant any harm'-they are jerks. I would use stronger language but I am sure it wouldn't get printed. It's never an excuse to say "oh I never meant to hurt you" when a reasonable person knows the effect of their actions will be to hurt you.

They do know what they do. They do not care. For them it's all about me, me, me.

The real question is can you avoid having anything to do with these people before they hurt you? The answer is probably yes. Probably your intuition is strong enough to spot this type person ahead of time -IF you are willing to listen. Emotions, attraction, wishful thinking can get in the way of good judgment. Don't let your emotions rule your mind when evaluating a person's character.

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A female reader, Country Woman United Kingdom +, writes (8 March 2008):

Country Woman agony auntPersonally those people who say they didn't mean any harm are usually so deeply involved with their own feelings that they just never see that others get hurt by their inadequate way of talking to others.

I used to be with someone who was so sarcastic that it would cut me like a knife but they never realised how much pain it caused, however if I ever reversed this onto him it was a whole different ball game as he was sensitive for himself but due to the fact that his relationship with his own father was very damaged, he never really had a good male role model so he had not learnt the skills of being diplomatic or sensitive to others.

Think there are a lot of people who are scarred from life and hence they just switch off their feelings when talking to others.

Just my opinion.

Country Woman

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