A
female
age
36-40,
anonymous
writes: I went out with James about 5 times and we hit it off really well. I didn't sleep with him, just went on dates. My ex then contacted me and I was in a mess trying to figure out what to do. I broke it off with James because I wasn't sure how I felt. I didn't go back to my ex or see him but just used the time to reflect on things. A month later I contacted James and he asked me out again. We've been together for about 9 months now. James told me that after I dumped him he was 'heartbroken' so a friend set him up with this girl. He saw her a few times and ended up sleeping with her. He says he regrets it and wishes it never happened. He slept with her just before we met up again and did not contact her after that.What was she to him? A rebound?
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female
reader, anonymous, writes (12 May 2010): Thanks for the answers, all great. Yeah, I'm being selfish here I suppose...
A
female
reader, raiders +, writes (11 May 2010):
I really don't think that shouldn't matter to you. You left him to think on your ex during that time he used someone else to forget about you, you both realize that you both needed each other and got back together that all that should matter to you. Put it behind you and look forward.
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A
female
reader, Honeypie +, writes (11 May 2010):
She was a rebound AKA "I-still-got-it girl". Some people deals with break up differently. Some jump the nearest "bicycle" others take their time to move past the break up.
If you love him - Let it go.
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A
male
reader, CaringGuy +, writes (11 May 2010):
A rebound. And he regrets it, which is why he told you. Let it go.
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A
female
reader, CindyCares +, writes (11 May 2010):
Basically,yes. They call it "comfort sex ". Don't be mad at him about that- you were broken up at the time.
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A
female
reader, anonymous, writes (11 May 2010): Hunny! Taking time out to think about someone else is technically CHEATING TOO! Coz you are dedicating time, feelings and effort to someone else OTHER than the one you are with! I believe that James was only trying to secure his position in the event that you thought about your ex and decided to stay with him! You need to think outside of your own needs a little. Did you consider what he was going through whilst you were on the fence??? The woman he slept with was his security blanket. For the next time you are unsure about who you want to be with...then I believe that the people involved have the right to protect their feelings!
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A
female
reader, anonymous, writes (11 May 2010): we'll you've said it yourself
'He says he regrets it and wishes it never happened'
&
'He slept with her just before we met up again and did not contact her after that.'
She was obviously nothing to him, he just got set up with someone & thought oh what the hell! because you were nowhere to be seen.
Let it go, he's with you isn't he?!
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