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*onelydiva80
writes: I've been in love with the same man for 7 years. We've been on and off. He has a girlfriend now but he still have feelings for me, and he's very honest about what he feels. To me he seems confused. I love him and I want to be with him but I don't know how. I don't know what to do. I've given him space to be with this girl but for some reason I'm all he thinks of and he is always showing concern for me. Should I be patient and wait for him or should I let him go for good?
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reader, Your big sis +, writes (9 June 2005):
 Let him go for good. Please don't waste any more time on him. It seems he thinks of you good enough to keep around when he needs you for...sex?...possibly... The point is he doesn't think of you as long term material such as marriage. If he did, he would of married you already. He is still searching for that special someone and sorry dear, that special someone is NOT you. You held on for 7 years hoping and loving. You WILL make a man out there very happy. Just wait and see.
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reader, Bev Conolly  +, writes (8 June 2005):
 This isn't going to be what you want to hear, but I don't think he feels about you the way you wish he did.Think about it. He's just got a new girlfriend, you write. So before that, he was available, wasn't he? Why didn't he hook up with you then?He may have "feelings" for you, but from what you've written, your feelings are far stronger than his. If he wanted to be your man, he would have found some way to do it. He wouldn't have started dating someone else, if it was you that he really wanted, would he? That's just not logical! He might be keeping you on the line because it's a stroke to his ego, but that's not the same thing as loving you.Walk away from this waste of the last seven years, or you'll spend more years being "off and on" with someone who isn't showing any sign that he wants to be with you.Sorry hon. I calls 'em as I sees 'em.
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reader, D_Missy +, writes (8 June 2005):
It's very possible that he may just be trying to distract himself from thinking of you. He may also be afraid of commitment. Try talking to him about it. Ask him if he's ever wanted to get into a serious relationship with you. If he says yes or sways towards that anwser, just give him his space and let him catch up with himself. If he says no, there are plenty of fish in the sea, my dear! :)
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