A
female
age
36-40,
*weetlilpeachx69
writes: last night my boyfriend asked if we can slow down on the sex .. we live together how do i just ignore my drive whilei am in bed beside him? he said it feel like routine ... Reply to this Question
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female
reader, mum2be  +, writes (25 September 2007):
next time you both want sex, try doing something new, to spice it up. Maybe a bit of roleplay, new positions or more foreplay. Once you both find some new things you like (maybe a toy?) then your love life should improve. Make sure you dont force your partner into anything though
xxx
A
female
reader, cupidhelper +, writes (25 September 2007):
it's okay to take a break--it's not the end of your relationship.
if you feel after a pause he still doesn't want to then you have: a cheater, a depressed man (it cause no sex drive), a whore/madonna, someone with a different sex drive, or just plain work on your relationship.
if he's not a cheater or depressed, then more sexy isn't going to help unless he likes that. He might want less sexy, innocean-- as in pretending you've never had sex and he's your teacher or violator depending on fantasy.
Don't assume, ask he what he likes. routine is the nature of any good relationship; also the killer.
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A
female
reader, anonymous, writes (24 September 2007): A guy who wants to slow down on the sex? That's weird. Well I guess sex can become routinish in some cases. But you are intitiating it and all that. I thought guys liked that.
Well I have a way that I always do to make guys want me all the time. I am extremely coquettish and flirty and sexy and girly when we are not in bed. I mean just out at dinner or the beach. Just do things outside of "the bed" that will make him think of sex. But don't make it obvious that you are trying to do that. Act like you are just like that. And laugh alot.
The thing with guys is that seeing you naked or showing him your new sex move is not the only thing that is going to keep him satisfied. Guys actually love it when you make them want you. Sometimes even distance helps. Go out of town with your friends for the weekend to let him miss you. And when you come back be real sexy but wait till he initiates sex. And then when he does, make him wait for it some more. He'll really want you then.
Also being independent makes guys want you too. Just acting like you have alot going for you and acting like you adore him but really don't need him all the time makes guys want you. And start acting fabulous and confident. Like every guy in the world would love to have you. Like that.
If this doesn't work though, then maybe your relationship is just not going to work out. I just find it weird that he doesn't want to have sex that often.
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A
female
reader, leanne.od +, writes (24 September 2007):
 spice things up!!
he probably knows when you're going to do it, how it's going to be done and how long it will take.
sexy pics are good, and leave little notes on the bathroom mirror in the morning, one word, like bj, and it'll get him thinking.
try and have sex when he doesn't expect it, wear stockings and high heels, but don't let him touch you, and don't actually have sex that night. his sex drive will back, and you'll be back on track.
best of luck
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A
male
reader, PrestonA90 +, writes (24 September 2007):
Well sex is a good routine for both partners use sex as more as a meaning that a feeling although it's hard lol. But we can all do it
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A
reader, anonymous, writes (24 September 2007): Perhaps you should try having sex at different times of day,in different rooms and positions.Theres nothing worse than doing a days work, having your tea, watching a bit of telly, going to bed and having sex in the missionary position.
Maybe you are experimental but his sex drive isnt as high as yours.Its very harsh for him to say that its like routine, sounds like he is a bit fed up. See if there is anything he needs to talk about.
Dont take what he said to heart, Im sure he didnt mean it as it was taken x
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