A
female
age
41-50,
*rtie
writes:hi my question is i have a friend that i have grown closer to and now have feelings for.i asked him to be honest about were he wants to take our friendship. we are both with other people. he told me he wants to go further but has to much to loose i respect that but every time we see each other he keeps giving me the come on what do i do is he just taking the micheal or what Reply to this Question
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female
reader, ortie +, writes (5 May 2008):
ortie is verified as being by the original poster of the questionthanks for your advice i know what you say is right,i do want something to happen with him but i also want my husband i suppose thats selfish of me wanting "my cake and eat it" but to be honest i like the attention the other man gives me,its like an ego thing knowing that someone else is interested.its not all the other mans fault ive flirted with him too,when i see him next i will be firmer with him and tell him to decide what he wants and if its no then he will have to stop making suggestive comments
A
female
reader, ortie +, writes (4 May 2008):
ortie is verified as being by the original poster of the questionyes there is a marriage and children involved on one side and a partner on the other, he has had an affair in the past and got court out.its just the fact that he "dangles carrots" and says things he is always making comments about my chest size and how he wants to see them in the flesh.i dont want to loose his friendship in confronting him again about it.i just wanted to forget about it but its like he is messing with my emotions
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A
female
reader, Rhian2020 +, writes (4 May 2008):
Hello,I was also in the same situation not so long ago. I also developed feelings for a friend. Like you,I asked him to be honest about where he wanted to take our friendship. He kept telling me that he didn't have feelings for me but was always flirting with me and texting me and kept putting 'love you' on the end of every text. Even when we both were with other people he kept flirting with me and even kissed me on a night out. Sadly it took me two years to realise that I was wasting my life on someone who couldn't give me a straighforward answer. Today we are still friends and see each other regularly, with the understanding that nothing will ever happen between us again. You must give this guy an ultimatum, he either starts being honest with you and makes his mind up or you leave it all there which will be hard as you've developed feelings for him. If he can't give you a decent answer then you'll have to try and move on. If this happens only you two can decide whether your friendship can survive. Whatever you decide to do just consider the other people that are in your lives as I'm sure they would be deeply upset and angry if they found out about what's been going on.Good luck.xx.
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