A
female
age
41-50,
anonymous
writes:Me and my boyfriend have been going nearly a year now, and it seems to be going great but one thing bugsme all the time, He doesnt want anymore kids he already has a 2year old and says he dosent want any more where one day i would love to have one with him,I guess my main question is when we hve sex we never use any protection and im not on any contruseption stuff at all, but when he thinks hes about to cum he will pull out quick and put a condom on and pull out when hes just bout to without puting it on, my mate said he may want kids but wont admit it or are we just taking the risks, shorley if he really didnt want kids that much he would use something before we even start Please help i need as much help as poss its bugging me for the past few days even tho never really crossed my mind in the past month or so
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reader, anonymous, writes (1 August 2008): if he says he doesnt want children then that is how he feels. Because you are taking risks doesn't mean he secretly wants one.
After dating a year this is a serious conversation you should be able to have. you will have to tell him that one day you will want children.
If he is adamant that he never wants children again then you may have to accept that he doesn't ever want children.
A
male
reader, LazyGuy  +, writes (1 August 2008):
 He is a jerk. Congrats, your mom must be so proud.
You make a good couple, you are with a bf who doesn't want kids but not using contra-ceptives and letting him do something idiotic with a condom. Do you enjoy the though of being a single mother? He already deserted another kid, why do you think the next will be any different?
Remember just one simple thing. MEN DO NOT GET PREGNANT. He is not taking any risks. You are.
Your mate is an idiot.
Cya in a couple of months when you are pregant and single.
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A
female
reader, Angela.B +, writes (1 August 2008):
 If you carry on the way you have been doing, sooner or later you will get pregnant, want kids or not.
What happens then? If he doesn't want kids will he stick around, or do a runner?
Contraception is the responsibility of both partners, and one (or even better both) of you needs to make a sensible decision about it.
If you aren't willing to be left on your own bringing up his child then you are being pretty irresponsible. If he isn't willing to father a child then he is being very selfish.
Please don't presume "he must really want one or he wouldn't do this" because he wouldn't be the first man to get a girl pregnant and then disappear.
If he won't act like a mature adult about this issue, then you have to.
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