A
female
age
41-50,
anonymous
writes:Very confused asked for space from boyfriend of over 5 years because of commitment issues and him wanting an open relationship (hes 45!!! im 42. we both have been married before and had children from our previous marriages) We are best friends and love each other but he just can't be with one woman anymore. He still wants me in the picture and of course others. So I told him i need space for awhile so we can come back and maybe be friends and/or ocassional sex buddies (w/protection of course). But I need time to cut the emotional ties. After 9 days apart he started emailing ,calling, emailing me on a personal dating site i'm on. I did not call him back but eventually emailed him back and told him again I need more time if we are to remain friends and all. Now he is mad at me because hewants to see me sooner, hes thinks i don't want sex w/him and keeps asking if i'm seeing someone else, he tells me he misses me and is thinking of me??? Just wondering why he is doing this?Control? Thanks !!!
View related questions:
best friend Reply to this Question
Share |
Fancy yourself as an agony aunt? Add your answer to this question! A
female
reader, burningbridges  +, writes (29 June 2007):
The fact that he wants to see other women but cares if you see other men means that he's all but said he wants a harem. Tell him you've met a very nice man and are very, very happy. ;)
A
female
reader, Country Woman  +, writes (29 June 2007):
 Sweetheart, when a man says he wants to see other women, then let him, don't be a sex buddy, you are worth so much more than that.
Do you honestly want a relationship like that or do you want one where the guy is more than happy with just you?
He is angry and upset because the grass is not always greener on the other side and the fact that you are currently rejecting him is making him think another guy is in there where he was, stupid man.
Sorry to be blunt but he wants both pots of cream, it is the cake and eating it scenario. Don't do it, your self respect goes out the window.
You are not a child anymore and if you allow him to use you in this way for sex and he is getting it elsewhere as well no amount of protection is fail safe.
I was asked my many friends that if my ex wanted to get back with me would I do it, I told them what I am telling you, no sorry he is now USED GOODS and I don't do that.
Value your integrity and respect yourself.
There could be a fantastic guy you miss out on just because you are having casual sex with your ex.
Life has so many more opportunities to offer you and if you allow yourself to be used now it will never change. You also have children from a previous relationship so what sort of example does it set to them. Mum is not strong enough? Sorry if that is harsh but I will only express my honest opinion.
Look at yourself in the mirror and tell yourself that you are gorgeous, young and have got a hell of a lot to offer a man, if your ex is too stupid to see that then he is so not worthy of you.
Find yourself someone who is going to be happy with what he has got and does not need to stray away.
Take care.
BFN
Country Woman
...............................
A
female
reader, love-him +, writes (29 June 2007):
 um you said ''hes thinks i don't want sex w/him and keeps asking if i'm seeing someone else'' umm you want to have sex with him?? he will be having sex with other people.. let him go.. honestly he sounds like my grandad (60) he cant keep a relationship and has sex with others, his new g/f is 20.. and im 16.. right.. yes he is jelous of you.. the thaught of u with someone else is annoyin him, but he wants sum1 else.. that isnt good. find someone else babe.. mail me if u wanna talk x x x x
...............................
A
reader, anonymous, writes (29 June 2007): Because he is an idiot and you have set a pattern by being his sex buddy, that is pretty much all you are to him and he has told you ss much, he is not interested in you for a long term relationship, he has been there done that....get out now, cut all ties, being a sex buddy won't help you move on, cut this poop head out of your life unless you are happy in a steaming pile of poo!
...............................
A
female
reader, anonymous, writes (29 June 2007): you two have a f***ed up relationship and need to be far away from each other, what youre doing is not healthy
...............................
|
