A
female
age
36-40,
*rioearth
writes:I don't even know where to begin. My boyfriend told me today that we need a break. It completely blindsided me. As far as I knew we were fine, even sleeping together not even two days prior. Today, though, I found a used condom in his garbage that was not from me. I don't know how to confront him on this. He says he needs time and his space, yet he keeps calling me to make sure I'm ok and is talking to me like nothing happened. I am completely confused and upset because I had to move out of his house and back into my moms. Any insight or advice would greatly help.
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Fancy yourself as an agony aunt? Add your answer to this question! A
male
reader, anonymous, writes (10 September 2009): You have your own stash of condoms?
The "we need a break call" is usually the result of him finding another lover. However...
Before you jump to conclusions, make sure you have your facts straight. Does he have a friend or family member with keys to his place? Maybe they popped in for a quickie and left it in his trash can.
Maybe he masturbated with it.
Nah... I'm just messin' wif' ya'. He screwed around behind your back.
Time to move on and find a new guy.
A
male
reader, Your friend  +, writes (10 September 2009):
 He is having sex elsewhere and feeling guilty about how you feel so keeping in contact with you makes him feel less guilty. Cut all communication with him and you will find a very different response.
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A
reader, anonymous, writes (10 September 2009): Hey firt off Ive great sympathy for you that you are going through this.I think your boyfriend cheated on you, and didnt have the guts to tell you. Thats what it looks like to me.I think for you, you need to grieve the relationship.Part of this will be cutting all contact. its a personal decision for you as to what you are willing to say to him . Personally I wouldnt waste breath on someone who cheated on me.Youll get through this, Of that I have no doubt
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