A
female
age
30-35,
*sBriaBaybi
writes: Ok ppl...Im having a little boy trouble.. I'm at a point in my life where i want to have a boyfriend and be "in love"..Thats not exactly working out as i planned.. I was beginning to talk with this one guy..and we had a lot in common..our birthdays were three days apart, we talked on the phone for hours, and we just had fun together.. just so their weren't any misunderstandings i told him that i was looking for a boyfriend from the jump..he said he was searching for the same, after two weeks he figured he didn't want a girlfriend any more..I felt like he wasted my time..The next guy.. we had the same problem...he said i acted like he owed me something just because i was a little frustrated that he did not do wat he said on time knowing i live an hour away, he felt as if i was trying to act like his girlfriend and i didn't think that was the impression i was giving..in both of these situations they say i was acting like their girlfriend but to me nothing changed.. wat am i doing wrong? Reply to this Question Share |
Fancy yourself as an agony aunt? Add your answer to this question! A
female
reader, k_c100 +, writes (4 August 2009):
Maybe it just comes across like that because you are so desperate to get a boyfriend! The thing about relationships is you cannot make them happen, it is normally something that will take you by surprise when you least expect it. Constantly hunting for a boyfriend so you can fall in love will never get you anywhere, you are putting too much pressure on these guys to be the boyfriend you are looking for!
Just ease off a little when you do meet a guy, take time to get to know them properly and for them to get to know you, rather than knowing you as the crazy girl that wants a boyfriend! You dont have to tell them upfront that you are after a boyfriend - that will scare most guys your age off! Just talk to them, hang out together and have some fun and see where it goes. You will be able to judge what the guy wants from you when you get to know him - and he may even start of thinking he doesnt want a girlfriend but may change his mind when he starts to fall for you!
Guys like a girl to go with the flow, to not get stressed out over little things and just for that girl to be a cool person to hang out with. if you show a guy how great you are without all the crazy "I want a boyfriend, you must call me when you said you were going to" business, then you might just get a boyfriend. But if you continue on this man hunt then you will just scare them all away!
You are still young and the right guy will come along soon, just chill out a bit and stop forcing things!
I hope this helps and good luck!
|