A
female
age
30-35,
anonymous
writes:I've been with my boyfriend for little over 5 yrs. We have a baby it was perfect when we first started we've been on and off. We now have a baby he treats me really bad at times and puts me down yet says he loves me sooo much that I have to understand him because he has anger issues I love him and I've talked to him how its killing me inside but nothings changed any advice??
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female
reader, TasteofIndia +, writes (23 June 2010):
 He says you "have to understand him" because he's got "anger issues"???!? Sweetness, he is just saying this as an excuse for his behavior. He is making you feel guilty about not liking the way he treats you. This, my dear, is crap. There is NO EXCUSE for putting you down and treating you badly. You say he loves you soooo much, if he did, would he hurt you? His girl and the mother of his child? I don't think so. My fella loves me like crazy and would never dream of doing anything that kills me on the inside.
He needs to go and actively get help, or get out of your life. I wouldn't wait around, you don't want your baby seeing the way he treats you and to think it's okay. Your baby may be young, but kids absorb this stuff like sponges. Your baby needs a happy mother, and a good support system. Your boyfriend is not providing that. By not taking care of you, he's not taking care of your little one.
Do you have family or a friend you can stay with? I think you need to give yourself some space to think about this, and your boyfriend needs to realize what he's losing by letting his "anger issues" out on you.
Good luck, sweetness!! I wish the best for you and your baby.
A
female
reader, Spades  +, writes (22 June 2010):
 He is saying he has anger issues as a disclaimer. He is informing you of this so that you know it's not him, it's his anger. It's not his fault..
No. This is HIS problem and something that HE has to fix. It is not up to you to put up with his bad behaviour. If he truely loved you, he would care that it kills you inside. I would advise to him that either he sort his anger out or I wouldn't be in the picture for much longer.
This is not the environment a child should be growing up in.
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