A
female
age
51-59,
anonymous
writes:I'm still suffering emotionally and mentally in finding out about my husband going to prostitutes across 2 years , he was visiting a brothel , he says he was going about 1 month and says we had problems , then he says that it's because he was curious ?? We have been together for 27 years and I was his only sexual partner , we did have a lot of financial issues as I've always been the main earner and it's very stressful , he says he would never go there again as he doesn't want to loose his family !! He said he would go for 30 mins and pay £50 now I know that my husband doesn't last more than 3mins during inter course and we do a lot of oral to make sex more lasting and enjoyable , but he swears that he didn't do oral with these hookers , so I can't understand what he would be doing for 30 mins ???
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male
reader, Sageoldguy1465  +, writes (9 October 2014):
 Forget the "3-minutes-versus-30 minutes" thing and focus on THIS.... which is the crux of your submittal: "....he says he would never go there again as he doesn't want to loose his family !!"
What's happened is, that he got caught with his pants down.... and he's petrified that YOU will do (what you should do) and kick his sorry, cheatin' ass to the curb.
Forget what goes on at/in the brothel and ask YOURSELF: "Do I want a lying, no-good, mooching husband?"
The answer to THAT question will take you a long way to the ultimate answer to the "question" that you pose, here.
Good luck....
A
female
reader, Honeypie +, writes (9 October 2014):
 Just eww.... My husband would be out on his ear if he went to prostituted and then tried to get in my bed. GROSS. I wouldn't WANT him to touch me with a 50 foot pole, not for 3 minutes or 30.
First of all YOU and HE needs to get a STD panel done and ASAP.
CONSIDER this, EVERY single DUDE ANY of these prostitutes have had sex with (and please don't believe the whole bull crap about - oh they use protection EVERY TIME) can give her all kind of crap. And that comes back to YOU.
As for how long he lasts with them, well he pays for her time, not just the time on her knees or back. So if she gets him off in 30 seconds he would still have to pay for 30 minutes minimum.
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A
female
reader, anonymous, writes (9 October 2014): I'd pack his bags for him, and tell him he should get tested for HIV. You get tested too. If he's given it to you (or any STD's!) then the divorce papers would be ready the very next day.
This isn't a one night drunken mistake and he has owned up, begged for forgiveness and tried to make it up to you. This is a man who for 2 years has sneaked off behind your back to shag other women. And not just any women but prostitutes! You are the main earner, you're hard earned cash has been spent on sex. These girls could have been forced to be there, victims of human trafficking, raped, beaten or potentially drug addicts trapped in a life that thanks to low life's like your husband who continue to see sex as a commodity that can be bought and sold. Whatever reason they're there, are they really in a position to be ensuring that "customers" use protection?
I can't see why you'd be worrying about his performance in bed, and what else he would've been doing for 27minutes. He probably was lasting 3 minutes at home because he was exhausting himself elsewhere.
I don't mean to sound harsh, but can't you see you deserve more respect than this? He has put you at risk of disease, potentially life threatening diseases. You deserve to be loved and cared for, not used. Please see that you are worth more than being lied to and cheated on. Take a long look at yourself and tell yourself you are worth more than this. Don't be with someone because it's what you're used to, and all that you know. He's obviously got a side to him he's never let you know and was capable of hiding something for 2 years. Be strong xx
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A
reader, anonymous, writes (9 October 2014): I hope you've gotten tested for HIV and I want you to go back and reread your post.
This man doesn't want to lose his family after he got caught!
If you were having financial problems, didn't you notice he wasn't bringing home full pay and contributing a fair portion to the household budget?
You're concerned about his bedroom endurance? Am I missing something here? This man not only cheated on you, he was paying prostitutes. He only stopped, because you discovered he was doing it.
How do you know he lasted 30 minutes with them? Maybe because they do things to him you don't do for those extra 27 minutes. I think your concerns are misplaced. He could have infected you HIV and other STD's. He doesn't want a divorce; because there won't be anyone to cook, clean, and support him.
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A
male
reader, olderthandirt  +, writes (9 October 2014):
 I'm told there is a minimum charge even if you just talk with one. He might have just been talking over his problem to a sypathetic ear.
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A
male
reader, anonymous, writes (9 October 2014): Probably oral, also touching.
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A
female
reader, CindyCares  +, writes (9 October 2014):
 Maybe nothing . They charge 30 minutes anyway, whether the client uses them all , or takes a nap,or puts on his clothes and goes away after 3 minutes.
Then again, I would not take as good as gold his word that he did not do oral with them. Why should he be telling you the truth ?..It's not as if he is such a trustworthy guy that you can believe all he says.
The truth is , that he was visiting prostitutes behind your back, and he did not come clean about it, you CAUGHT him somehow. So, how likely it is that he is telling you the truth about what exactly he did with them ?.
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