A
female
age
30-35,
anonymous
writes:My boyfriend recently mentioned looking at porn, as though he thought it wouldn't bother me. I know that he doesn't look at porn often, but it still bothers me quite a bit. Am I overreacting?
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male
reader, anonymous, writes (22 April 2007): I don't really have any advice to give I'm sorry. Last night my boyfried mentioned that he'd been looking at picture books at work - just the home page girls tho - like that should make me feel better! We've been together just over 2 yrs and I've asked him before if he looked and he said no. He has a mate who sends him porn emails and he always makes out that its not what he's into... and now this. What the frig is it with men?? Why can't one woman ever ever ever be enough to keep them satisfied. I feel so foolish to have believed to really have thought that this guy was different. Sucked in eh?!
A
reader, anonymous, writes (19 April 2007): Thank god we have an educated person who knows that the number one use of the internet is porn, and that porn and prostitution have been around since before Christ. We all know that porn preys on women, but it's still out there. From your point of view, anyone who does something that you don't agree with should be told not to do it! AND YELLED AT!!! I doubt very much that the boyfriend is going to do everything that his girlfriend tells him. There is plenty of porn out there that is produced and directed by women. There is also computer animated porn that is produced and directed by women, for a target audience of women. Perhaps you don't want to support other women in their careers in porn, even if they chose it because they like it, and not because they all were molested as girls. I think your issues are your own personal views. She can be upset and offended, but she can't tell her boyfriend what to do, he has HIS own opinions as well.
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A
female
reader, anonymous, writes (19 April 2007): Oh and I forgot the most important thing....she told us IT BOTHERS HER...
Sorry OP but it makes me furious when uneducated people come along and make such silly suggestions as if you should put aside you happiness and self esteem and morals because of his porn...
Good on you for not falling into the trap of going along with it as if its acceptable like so many other young women do nowadays...a woman responder should know a heck of a lot better than to give such poor advice
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A
female
reader, anonymous, writes (19 April 2007): Why not look at it together???hmmm lets see...well its totally degrading to women.
It unrealistically portrays womens bodies (especially after babies) and sexual behvaiours
Over 90% of the female porn stars were sexually molested as children (so you are feeding of that pain)
recent research has shown that even 1 hours exposure to mild porn reduces a mans concept of how attractive his wife/girlfriend is
YOU NEED MORE REASONS THAN THAT????
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A
female
reader, lucky lynne  +, writes (18 April 2007):
 Most men look at porn,as do it some women.Why not look at it together?
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A
female
reader, XXpussycatXX  +, writes (18 April 2007):
hya
you a over reacting a slight bit but babe dont worry bout it coz at the end of the day it is only a fantasy 2 them ur the real deal...my bf looks at porn and he has got it on his phone it nothing to it at first i admit that it was a bit weird at first then i just thought bugger it e can do wat e wants it just dont bothe me anymore a lot of people take it as the guy cheating on them but that certaintly aint the case so plz jus dont worry bout it k
xxx
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A
female
reader, birdynumnums  +, writes (18 April 2007):
 I think women have different ideas about porn, some really object to it because it degrades women, some don't care one way or the other, and some enjoy it themselves. I'd only get concerned if he looked at it everyday or was looking at the less savory, weird stuff. I really don't have a problem with the fact that men are visual in their sexual curiosity, and I'd much rather my husband look at something one-dimensional than satisfy his urge for visual variety with three-dimensional ones!!! (Who on earth came up with the term "Gentlemen's Club"? It's not a club and there are never any "Gentlemen" in them!). I don't think that you will get a straight answer if you ask him to quit viewing it, he'll probably just hide it and that's probably creating a bigger problem, teaching him to lie to you. Better to deal with the devil you know than the one you don't. This is only my opinion, you will have to figure out for yourself how you feel about porn and his viewing habits.
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A
female
reader, anonymous, writes (18 April 2007): In my opinion your boyfriend is just a normal, red-blooded man. As long as this isn't a habitual thing, as a woman I really don't see anything wrong with your boyfriend watching porn. If he does watch porn more than just occasionally communicate with him and tell him how much this bothers you. Good luck!
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