A
female
age
30-35,
anonymous
writes:Hey, I'd really appreciate some advice.I was going to go out with my boyfriend and some of his mates last night but decided I was too tired so told him I wouldn't be making it. He seemed a bit upset but whatever... This morning I got a text from him explaining how he screwed up and felt awful because he kissed some old friend and wanted to tell me before anyone else did and that he was really sorry. He then called me, said how sorry he was and that she came on to him, and I didn't know what to say, I was basically silent... Anyway, went to school, pretended everything was normal, and then after school he drops by home to give me some flowers and chocolate, basically I was silent again... He asked me if I was ok and I said yea and then he had to go... I know I said we were ok, but should I really forgive him? I mean, it's good that he told me and was honest I guess but perhaps only as to tell me "before anyone else does" as he explained. Also to mention that she came on to him, it's like making excuses isn't it? Regardless of whether she came on to him or not, it doesn't make it any better... Anyway, he did sound genuine in his apology and it was sweet that he bought me flowers and all, but does that justify it? Or should I forgive him and am I just over reacting? I know if he ever did it again I'd dump him because I know there are lots of girls that fall into the traps of dating absolute jerks that cheat continuously yet make up excuses. But at the moment this could have just been a one off thing... Sorry this post has been kinda long, but what do you all think i should do?
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female
reader, Emilie  +, writes (4 August 2007):
 Aw Hey honey, Forgive him, he's only screwed up once right? and he had the guts to tell you, bring you flowers an chocolates while apologising all the way? He sounds genuine and if he done all that just to make it up to you... well he sounds as if the only girl he truely loves is you even if he did kiss some silly ol' friend. She means absolutly nothing to him. But only this once! If it happens again don't be so forgiving. If he really cares about you he will only ever make this one mistake and from here on in its up to you :) Best wishes and good luck for the future :) (hope it goes well) xxx
A
reader, anonymous, writes (3 August 2007): aaaaaaaaw he seems sweet. normally that is used as an excuse but maybe he was just panicing out of guilt. forgive him. if it happens again though, dump him. but anyhoo... FORGIVE HIM!!! :D
XxXxX
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A
female
reader, aphexinfinite +, writes (3 August 2007):
 i think that it could be one of two things but he might not of told you on one hand because she came onto him and didnt want you to split up with him encase you didnt believe him their are many explantions for this, if you feel unsure ask a friend or someone who was their what happened, but to me he seems really sorry for this and if its true that she came onto him and he stopped her then he was being true to you it does happen that some people jump on people go hey get off dont kiss me ive got a gf then things stop in their tracks..ide prob either ask someone who was their or just leave it as an incident, and if he does it again then say no thats it things like that dont happen more than once lol..hope this helps xx A
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A
female
reader, vickiii07 +, writes (3 August 2007):
 I personally think you should forgive him. He had the guts to tell you he screwed up before anyonelse got the chance.
You need to build trust with him again though and tell him firmly if he screws up again its over between you to!!
Hope i have helped !!
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A
female
reader, hlskitten +, writes (3 August 2007):
 I wouldnt jump the gun and dump him. I cant stand cheats but the fact this guy is saying it was just a kiss & she came onto him AND he made sure he told you the very next day, kinda has me thinking you shouldnt give up on him for this one thing.
Obviously if he goes out all the time, drinking & losing his innibitions then you are better off without that. But this time, although i would be very angry and hurt too, i wouldnt end the relationship. It does kinda sound like a drunken stupid moment he regretted as soon as he did it. And the fact he told you, at the moment, shows he has a conscience.
Gotta be your call at the end of the dau though. Only you know him & know if you love the guy enough to stay with him anyway.
Good luck
C xxxxx
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