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female
age
36-40,
anonymous
writes: In need of help Please. Me and my ex of six year broke it off five months ago. (lived together for five years) Shortly after the break up he entered a new relationship. I was hurt to the core knowing that he moved on so quickly. I didn't have contact with him until two weeks ago. He called my parents house looking for me twice before I returned his call. Bascially he wanted to know how I was doing, then he went on to say that he missed me. I told him its best that we no longer communicate with him having a girlfriend. He told me he loves me too much not to have contact with me forever, but if that's what i want he will respect it. Although it will be hard and if that what makes me happy. I'm confused I don't understand what he wants. He is still with his girlfriend so why is he calling me, and why is it important for us to communicate.
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female
reader, Honeypie  +, writes (10 July 2012):
 I think he likes the idea of you still being hooked on him and not moving forward yourself all the while he is doing a new relationship. Could be he would like you have you as his "fall back girl" in case the new relationship doesn't live up to his expectations.
You DO NOT have to remain in contact, specially if it's holding YOU back from getting over him and moving forward.
Don't worry about what HE wants, focus on YOU and what YOU want.
My advice, stop letting the PAST hold you back from YOUR future. Tell him you can't remain in contact.
A
female
reader, BondGirl72 +, writes (10 July 2012):
 First, you cannot have contact with him because all of the old feelings will still be there and you will expect things to be the same. Men and women cannot be friends if they have had a relationship. They just can't. Guys will often use this line because they can't bear to separate from a girl completely, but it never works. Secondly, you have told him there shouldn't be contact, so don't contact him. Don't answer his calls or texts. He has a girlfriend and he needs to be with her. If he calls your family, tell them not to answer the phone or have them tell him that you do not want to talk to him anymore. So, I basically agree with what Cerberus said...he wants his cake and wants to eat it too. In other words, he wants both of you. Sorry, but things do not work that way. Don't be confused by this. He is butting into and interrupting your life where he should mind his own business. I know that is rather harsh when you are reading it, but you need to move on. Don't allow him to continue to play games with you.
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A
reader, anonymous, writes (10 July 2012): He wants to cheat on her with you. I mean he already emotionally cheated on her in that one call by telling you how much he loves you.
Look OP, you know it's best if you don't have anything more to do with him, he said he'd respect that so that's what you must do.
Who cares how he feels? He shouldn't be going behind his new girls back to make that kind of phone call should he? He should have worked harder to prevent the break up months ago.
There should be no come backs here OP, he's acting like an emotionally blackmailing cheater, trying to rebuild a relationship with you behind his girlfriends back and then mess with your head too.
No thanks, move on. His feelings and mopy crap is too little too late.
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