A
female
age
26-29,
anonymous
writes:Hi everyone i need help bad! I'm 13 almost 14 and i'm dating a almost 17 year old. I really like him but he keeps pressuring me about sex. We already kiss, and I've given oral, but im not comfertable when i do it. He says i dont love him if i dont do this stuff,and i do love him thats why i do it. But i get scared he gets mean and angry if i say no to sex he's even slapped me,also my friends have told me it hurts when you have sex, and i dont think i'm ready mentally for it. But i want to lose my virginity for the right guy, and i think it's him but... Im so confused what should i do? Reply to this Question
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Fancy yourself as an agony aunt? Add your answer to this question! A
reader, anonymous, writes (25 October 2010): hii...
sweetie, i am going to tell you exactly what everybody else has. GET OUT!!! this is not love, it's not healthy, and you don't deserve to be treated this way. you need to tell somebody you trust about what's going on--whether it's your parents, a teacher, a friend...just find someone who will know what to do to help you, and tell them. i know nobody wants to be a snitch, but in this case, it would be in your best interest to be one. if he threatens to hurt you or somebody you love or anything like that whenever you tell him that you're done, don't listen to him. i know that it will be scary if he uses that approach, but the truth of the matter is, if you tell on him, it's not likely that he's going to be able to do anything except prepare to be put in cuffs. what he is doing to you is abuse, and i'm positive that there are some pretty stringent methods of legal action that can be carried out against him for it. and if he gets all "emotional" and starts "crying" and begging, "ohh, baby, i love you; please take me back; it'll never happen again," don't give in. this loser does not love you, and he does not deserve you. let him go, and carry on living the life that you deserve to live. above everything else, just remember to put all of your faith and trust in God. He won't let you down. ")
good luck, and God bless,
~sarsar~
A
female
reader, anonymous, writes (25 October 2010): Omg! honey leave him NOW before he hurts you! He is not the right guy and he does not love you. If he did he would not be pressuring you or hitting you. If you stay with him he will most likely force himself on you and continue to hit you. Please be smart and leave him!
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A
male
reader, anonymous, writes (25 October 2010): This guy is NO DAMN GOOD but you already are figuring that out.
Take care of yourself, get out, completely out, of this relationship. Don't see him, don't talk to him, don't allow him to talk to you, don't worry about what he might or might not say.
I've got daughters your age and we've also had this problem with one boy we had to run off and tell him to never come back.
If he'd slapped my girl...well, Hell would be a damn sight better than what he'd have dealt with.
I've got a wife and kids and slapping them isn't in the equation.
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A
reader, anonymous, writes (25 October 2010): okok im sorry but um i just wana be up front.HE'S NOT FUCKING WORTH IT YOU WILL GET HURT EVENTUALLY!.....LEAVE THIS GUY NOW!
okay, now...I see you being used. This boy isnt worth what you do for him. Yes, you say you love him but he doesnt want a thing else to do with you. Sure you'll be 14 soon, but i still see you as a child.
lol Be that as it may, im 15. BUT this isnt something you need to be in. Expecially being sexually active with him, he knows what hes's doing is absolutely wrong.
1.He's taking you for granted. 2. You'll mostly get hurt physcally later. 3. Your far too young.
He's a PERFECT example of why the majority of the parents every one knows says that all boys just want sex. Well, thats not completely true. But thats beside the point hun.
You came here asking for help, take our words to heart and leave him immediately. Your under 18 who THINKS they love a manipulative, careless fucker that doesnt give a fuck about whats actually going on here. He needs to be far away from you.
You cant give this guy what he wants just because you think you love him. What you do for him is beyond what he deserves. I swear, if i really knew you hun, im not afraid to kick some ones ass :)
Sorry for a foul mouth,but honestly sweetie....Dont think we're wrong, cause damnit we're fucking right.
XOXO I hope the best for you sweetie
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A
female
reader, misLadYd..  +, writes (25 October 2010):
 if he slapped you for it,got angry just because you didnt do it then he is not the right.he wil just dump you after he gets what he wants from you.you love him but he wants sex thats all.if he loves you,he wouldnt pressure you
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A
reader, anonymous, writes (25 October 2010): He is absolutely NOT the right guy if he has resorted to physical abuse, telling you you don't love him if you don't have sex with him and pressuring you to have sex.
Get out of this relationship immediately. If you don't, his violence will most surely escalate.
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A
female
reader, legemini  +, writes (25 October 2010):
Dump this guy immediately. He's a predator. A boy who really loves you and cares about you would be understanding about you not wanting to have sex or sexual contact yet. He would let you go at your own pace.
He's saying that you don't love him to make you feel guilty and manipulate you. I hope that you realize that no one should ever force anyone to have sex before their ready. Guys who do this type of thing are the worst kind of person. Please leave this person asap. he's not worth it. When you meet a guy who is kind and really cares for you, sex will just happen naturally. You'll see!
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A
female
reader, tennisstar88 +, writes (25 October 2010):
 Get out of that relationship now, he's resorted to abuse if you don't give him what he wants. Tell your parents, or an adult if you can't get out.
You are under the legal age of consent, he however is 16-18 depending on the state of legal age of consent. If he forces you into sex, not only will he go to jail for rape, but also abuse, and statutory rape..He doesn't love you, not one bit. Tell him it's over, and if he tries anything let him know you will not hesitate to call the police. You are NOT ready to lose your virginity and he is NOT the right guy to lose it to. The right guy doesn't pressure you, he respects your decision and will wait however long it takes.
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