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female
age
30-35,
anonymous
writes: Recently this 22 year old guy has been flirting with me, I know him from a friend. I know he wants to have sex with me but I'm unsure wether to or not. Because your first time is supposed to be special, I know it's illegal, but I really like him. He also has a girlfriend and I know after it won't lead anywhere, What should I do?
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reader, anonymous, writes (4 September 2010): All i will say to you is dont have sex with him cuz he will never leave his gf. But he will keep you just for sex.
A
male
reader, anonymous, writes (23 April 2008): He doesn't sound very special. He just sounds like maybe he's one of the first guys you've had much romantic contact with.
Don't sleep with him. Please don't.
In a few years you will probably look back on this and think he should have been in jail for trying that with you. He's a grown man with a girlfriend, looking to screw around with someone who is barely stepping out of childhood.
Someone in your position doesn't need to have sex yet. There is so much else on the way to sex (physical stuff and relationship stuff) that you probably haven't even done yet.
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male
reader, previasc96  +, writes (23 April 2008):
Do not give your virginity to someone who is already in a relationship. When you have sex for the first time, if you keep seeing that person you'll develope a strong emotional attachment to him. You would be setting yourself up for heart ache for sure.
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A
female
reader, anonymous, writes (22 April 2008): sorry im going to go off on one here i know :) lol but read if you wish!well, im going pretty much through the EXACT same thing.only difference is im 16.but yeh the guy is 22..he has a girlfriend..it would be my first time...n yeh i do think he's niceand i dont know what to do either.i know its appealing, hes older, is interested in you even though he's taken, etcand the guy im deciding about is the lead singer/guitarist in a band which just adds to the cool factor lolbut he has said, not to tell anyone about any flirting and stuff going on between us, which i understand, he doesnt want to ruin things between his girlfriend or w.ebut what im thinking is, i would like to possibly have sex with him, even though i think id feel bad for his gf, ive only seen her around once before but she seemed nice!but i dont know whether its wise for him to be my first.and i think the same probs goes for you here.and heres my answer for you..and to myself!i know it seems tempting, but for your first time i wouldnt, go find someone who you would like to look back on and have good memories, not someone who (in my case) your not even allowed to mention to say your girl friends! plus youve got plenty of time to have sex anyway.and maybe one day in the future, he might come along again, and things might be in the right circumstances etc then heck go for it!but for now. id say, nah. hope this gets to you before you make your mind up :)and i just think its rather odd we are pretty much in the same boat too, hahai'd like to know how things work out for ya.byeee xxmy god that was long...sorry! haha
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female
reader, anonymous, writes (3 April 2008): Girl no don`t do it. If he can`t wait its not worth it.... take it from a chick that has been lead down that road. JUST WAIT, ITS WORTH IT
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female
reader, Gena Bullock +, writes (13 March 2008):
 Have some respect for yourself and leave it alone. You are better than that. He obviously isn't.
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male
reader, tux +, writes (13 March 2008):
 I'm going to give my simplest answer ever. Do not have sex with him. Do Not Talk to him. Do not pass Go. Do not even Think of him.
You are still young and there will be plenty of other guys out there more worth it than this guy. He has a girlfriend is the number one reason for me saying this. Yes he's 22 as well. But if a guy has a girlfriend already is a good reason not to be involved with him. It will lead nowhere but hurt before he leaves you for his next fling when he's tired of you.
~tux
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male
reader, Danielepew  +, writes (11 March 2008):
 You should not sleep with him. Sex with a minor is illegal for a good reason: the minor is at a disadvantage and might be easily abused. And I wonder whether a man who is that much older than you, and has a girlfriend, would be any good for you. Just don't do it.
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female
reader, anonymous, writes (11 March 2008): If he has a girlfriend then he would be cheating on her, and there's no guarantee he'd break up with her to be with you. He could be the kind of guy who would keep her around while having sex with you, and believe me, that would be incredibly hurtful for you. There is no reason in the world for a decent guy to have a girlfriend and then want to have sex with someone else, those kinds of guys are users and you don't deserve someone like that no matter how nice he is to you. And remember, there are people out there who will use "nice" just to get what they want. It's hard to believe because you don't think that way because you're honest, but don't make the mistake of thinking people have the same values that you do.
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male
reader, younghelper +, writes (10 March 2008):
 I completely agree with hope. you are to young, and if you slept with him it would be a HUGE mistake, because the guy might try to take advantage of you. Plus you would have to explain to your parents and that wouldn't be very fun. So take all of our advice, DO NOT SLEEP WITH HIM!
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reader, anonymous, writes (10 March 2008): No, no no.
I have to suggest that this could be bull, but if not, my dear just the fact that I consider this to be some silly joke should give you your answer.
I don't care how grown up you think you are, but it is obvious that this is a dreadful and potentially dangerous or destructive association.
There is no way you should feel comfortable 'having sex' as you call it with him and I am not too impressed with the type of friends you are handing with who would encourage ANY type of relationship with this attached and older man. Your still a baby and will regret it!
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reader, anonymous, writes (10 March 2008): I don't think that it would be right for you to have sex with him.
You are too young at the moment.. but if you feel ready, then it should be with someone who you love and trust and who can give you their full attention.
If he has a girlfriend, he would just be using you if he slept with you. You don't want to regret anything now, your virginity isn't something you can get back, so lose it wisely!
xx Hope xx
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