A
female
age
30-35,
anonymous
writes: Okay I met this guy online. We fell in love and we couldn't wait to meet...or wait to finally make love. 6 months I move in and we had sex once. It Lasted a few seconds. He was so excited to have sex when we talked on the phone. And now he doesn't want it at all. We don't really kiss much or anything,but he is always asking for oral. I hardly ever get anything in return and if I say no For givivng him oral, he will get pissed. Earlier this happened and I told him how I felt, and he walked out of the room.When I ask to have sex he says he wants to wait till marriage..but I just always think of when we talked on the phone and he couldn't wait. It's really hurtful and frustrating. I don't want to leave him because then I'll feel like the selfish one. I just want to make him want me I guess. I'm not sure what to do.
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reader, anonymous, writes (11 December 2009): This is verified as being by the original poster of the questionI tell him all the time it was amazing and I beg for it all the time. He says he is small and the condoms doesn't fit but I'm always telling him it's perfect and anything bigger would hurt me anyways but he just won't have sex. I'm starting to feel like maybe it's my looks because he use to say I was sexy and beautiful all the time, and now...nothing. I'm a chubby girl but he's a chubby guy too so I'm confused. His ex was smaller than me and he told me he wouldve had sex with her if she wanted to..so that's another reason why I feel it's my weight.
A
female
reader, fishdish +, writes (11 December 2009):
here's a guess. Maybe he may be disappointed in his performance the first time around. he's really embarassed how things went, and how he really failed to give you pleasure and now he wants to avoid embarassing himself again and failing you. with blowjobs, theres no pressure to please the lady, and so he can get get off and again, avoid messing up what he may perceive as your high expectations (esp. after his building up talk); maybe you should try to build up his confidence and be like i wish you would come inside me again, or whatnot. or like you're so sexy when. but if that doesn't work there has to be a reciprocation talk.
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reader, anonymous, writes (11 December 2009): This is verified as being by the original poster of the questionWell I did today and he walked out on me. He is acting like nothing happened now and is hugging me but I still feel like crap.
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A
female
reader, Duckyhelp +, writes (11 December 2009):
Tell him how you feel, and if he reacts like that, being annoyed and pissed etc, dont stand for it. Its not like its his sole purpose is to be given oral. So if he reacts baddly when u refuse to do this al for him, just leave. Simple. Either he realizes that he was being stupid and is sorry, or he stays in that huff, therefore not worth it
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