A
female
age
36-40,
*ojapeach77
writes:I met this guy about 11 months ago. At first I blew him off alot but finally gave in and went out with him. From that moment, we had an instant connection. I found out a week later he was in a long-distance relationship but I didn't let me that bother me because you can't help when you meet the love of your life, right? Anyways, from that moment we spent every free moment together. He was my first for alot of stuff (I was always one of those girls that never payed attention to guys or dated). I'm 23, he's 22. (I am in the working world and he's still in college). Anyways, the more and more time we spent together the more it hurt that he was still with his girlfriend. About 3 months into our "relationship" she came to visit for a month and we didn't really talk much, I was crushed and vowed to break it off with him but when she left I was right back in his arms but things were a little different. He wasn't as affectionate and at one point I found out he was trying to date another girl at his school through a mutual friend. Anyways, after awhile he came back to me and we were good for a while. He even started kissing me again, being intimate, etc. He also broke up with his girlfriend. At this point, I kept wondering what would stop him from being in a relationship with me. He says he loves me but he's just not ready for a relationship. I don't understand, he even started to refer to me as a just a "friend" to other people. It's like one second I'm his friend then the next he talks about marrying me. A couple of weeks ago I told him I needed space because I want more and he basically has just let me walk away. After about 2 days I call him and we get into arguments because I don't understand why he's not chasing me. We spent all our time together 7 days a week, how can he just let me go like that? I'm so miserable and feel so heartbroken. I don't know what to do. I read in a book that if I guy is really that into you then nothing would stop him from wanting to be in a relationship with you. Should I just continue to walk away? I just miss him so much and feel so lonely.
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male
reader, anonymous, writes (22 October 2010): The guy is a cheater. You are infatuated with a cheater.
Protect yourself, because you are lonely and wanting something real, but you are getting something that is not good for you.
Take care of yourself.
A
male
reader, Jmtmj  +, writes (22 October 2010):
 "I read in a book that if I guy is really that into you then nothing would stop him from wanting to be in a relationship with you"
Well that's just not true. Nevertheless, you should keep walking away if you're after a relationship... you won't get it from him. Don't cave in to booty calls or anything either, you'll just end up getting hurt.
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A
female
reader, Aunty BimBim +, writes (22 October 2010):
 He is trying to date other girls, AND he was in a relationship with somebody else when he started seeing you, your response to that little fact was :
I didn't let me that bother me because you can't help when you meet the love of your life, right?
Maybe he is looking for a girl it WOULD bother. Just a thought ....
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A
female
reader, DanceInTheDark  +, writes (22 October 2010):
 Walk away. I've dealt with a guy like this. He sounds like he has commitment issues.
Guys like these just move onto the next girl.
I know you miss him, and I know you're lonely. But it's just going to hurt more when you keep going back.
Honestly, it sounds like he just wants his fun, you're probably just Friends with benefits to him. He likes you, he's willing to sleep you, but he doesn't want any serious commitment to you.
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