A
female
age
30-35,
anonymous
writes:My boyfriend of 5 years cheated on me a couple months ago. We've been working on our relationship and trust but i recently found out I contracted a std that resulted in a early miscarriage. Since I have been faithful all 5 years, my boyfriend must of caught the std when he cheated. Luckily its an std that we can get rid of, but the fact that it resulted in a miscarriage is really bothering me. Should I forgive him for this? How can we get over this second blow?
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female
reader, anonymous, writes (2 July 2010): Whether or not you should dump him is a question only you can answer, but you have to ask yourself some serious questions.
Not only did he betray you by cheating on you, but he put your life in danger. STDs are no longer just a shot of penicillin in some cases. You need to go get an AIDS test and so does he.
I would not stay with a cheating man, married or not. To me, cheating is a one-strike-and-you're-out deal.
I'm sorry about the loss of your baby. Best wishes to you.
A
female
reader, anonymous, writes (29 June 2010): I also am so very sorry for your loss. It's a terrible thing that I can only imagine will haunt you for years into the future. I would not forgive this. The loss of a child would be too much for me. And think of the possibility of getting pregnant again. Would this kind of man be good for child? But only you can truly say. Best of luck.
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A
male
reader, CaringGuy  +, writes (29 June 2010):
I'm not sure you should forgive a man who didn't even have protection when he cheated and did what he did to you in terms of the miscarriage. If my gf had no respect and cheated and gave me an STD, that would be a dealbreaker. It could have been AIDS or something that you couldn't cure. Its not like he cared or would have known.
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A
female
reader, QZ +, writes (29 June 2010):
 I'm so sorry to hear of your loss. It's hard to answer that because personally, I wouldn't forgive him for cheating and would leave. But if you stuck by him through that, the question is has he changed? Will he change? Can you trust him again? If you don't think so then yes, consider packing up. But if you feel you need to give him another chance suggest counselling for couples, or perhaps suggest some time a part to think.
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