A
female
age
30-35,
anonymous
writes:I am having trust issues with my fiance. We first got engaged just over a year ago. In july of this year he ended it providing no reason at all. During our time apart we continued to see each other. He also began to sleep with other girls (3 that i know of). It hurt me so much to find out this but it was as if i had lost all self control and if he clicked his fingers i would be there despite knowing what i new. after about 6 to 8 weeks of being apart he realised that it was me who he wanted and not the life he had began to lead. After a long talk we decided to give it another go. It was all goin fine untill one of the girls hed been with would not stop calling and ringing him. After a while i couldnt take no more and it ended up with me and him arguing. After i told him how i felt he changed his mobile number. All that aside since all this has happened my trust in him has almost gone. now hes going away over night and i dont know what to think. i want to trust him i really do im just finding it so hard. Any advice please?
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male
reader, CaringGuy +, writes (7 December 2009):
My advice to you would be to rethink very carefully whether you want to be with him or not, so you can then focus on either ending it or fixing it. He did come back, so to make this work, you both need to put a huge amount of effort in. I think you should tell him how you feel, and maybe hearing some reassurance will help you. Clearly though, if he does it again, he's not worth any more time.
A
female
reader, pinktopaz  +, writes (7 December 2009):
I don't think it's necessarily "trust issues." When I hear that, it makes me think of someone who doesn't trust someone for whatever reasons they may have, even though the other person hasn't given them any reason to not trust them. Your boyfriend/fiance, whatever he is, has given you reasons not to trust him. I really think you're always going to have these trust issues with him. My advice would be to have not gotten back with him, but it's too late for that. All you can do now is just hope that he's remaining faithful and isn't doing anything behind your back. You can't spy on him or have you in his sight 24/7, so that's all you really can do. If he does this again though, do not take him back!
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