A
female
age
30-35,
*ovely_menaime
writes::( please i need your help !! i was in a long distance relationship for more than 8 months ,i'm from tunisia and my boyfriend is from england .. we have never met but he said we were going to meet up last december but at that time we were fightin alot and we broke up .. we kept in touch and when we talked about it he said he felt insecure and he was always thinkin i'm gonna leave him so we broke up before meetin one another it's crazy cause i still love him and he said he loves me too i told him it's just a matter of time and that we will be together he said you know i love you but i just think i'm going to be waiting forever for you ... what hurts the most is that when we were together he used to tell me i'm ready to wait forever for you and now things seem to change and i want to know why? i mean he used to be interrested in me and we were talking all day long and stayed up all night long now we don't talk like we used to do .. a text everyday on facebook and sometimes he doesn't reply .. but he doesn't want me to move on !! i don't know what to think anymore he still loves me is it just the distance that made us broke up or what and can you help me and tell me why he has changed?now i deactivated my facebook account and msn he still has my phone number so i'm sure he will send me a txt asking me if i'm moving on or not or tellin me he's gonna give me time to forget about him and will call me 'my love' !! i mean he broke up with me i didnt so why is he doing all this ! is it right to go in a 'no contact' period ? cause it's a long distance relationship and i'm afraid he may jus forget about me ? so tell me please what to do !? and what to say if he asks me if i'm moving on ! i need to get him back cause i love him!
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broke up, facebook, I love you, insecure, long distance, move on, msn, period, text Reply to this Question
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female
reader, Denise32  +, writes (26 January 2011):
 Telling him you are ready to leave your friends and family to be with him REALLY is not a good idea!
Look, its way too soon to be giving him that kind of message. You haven't yet met in person; therefore you cannot, either of you, know whether you'd really hit it off and be well suited for a long-term relationship, now do you?
It might well scare him off. I hope it has not.
What you might consider is going to England FOR A VACATION, NOT to stay there permanently!! Visit him - unless he wants to fly to your home - spend some time and see how it goes. This would just be the beginning of discovering whether you are really compatible. Again, finding out takes a long time.....
Any other aunts or uncles want to chip in?
A
female
reader, lovely_menaime +, writes (26 January 2011):
lovely_menaime is verified as being by the original poster of the questionthank you .. i really don't know what to think anymore i told him i'm ready to leave my family and friends and be with him and he promised me to wait for me.. but now he seems to change .. and he doesn't want me to move on .. !
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A
female
reader, Denise32 +, writes (26 January 2011):
Dear lovely_menaime.......you know, you CAN'T love someone you've never met! It's not in real life, but the danger is you can build up all sorts or fantasies, expectations, dreams without actually seeing what someone is like on a day-to-day basis. It's impossible to know how compatible you are with someone unless you get to know him/her when they are having a rough day, are in a bad mood, as well as good.......that takes time, and even going out on dates you're both on your best behavior.
Sending texts, emails and msns is just no substitute for a personal meeting! Did you ever talk on Skype? At least on Skype you can see each other and have a live conversation.......
Anyway, you hadn't met and yet you were fighting with one another so you didn't get to see him in December after all. What ever were all the fights and arguments about? I'm not surprised he started to be afraid of losing you!
In any case, texting every day and spending half the night talking isn't a terribly good idea! You need your sleep, and both of you have your own lives to live and don't need to be in each other's pockets all the time, so to speak.
I don't really know what to tell you. Perhaps you could think about making definite plans to visit England soon (if that's where you were going to meet) and see how he responds.
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