A
female
age
30-35,
*miles99
writes:Yesterday my boyfriend came home from a ski trip. When he came back he told me we should break up. He said that the reason was that he felt like more of just a friend then a boyfriend and that it was better for him. I told him we can try and fix it. He said that we cant and that he has been feeling like this for 2 months, but he never told me. It was completely out of the blue for me. We went out for 10 months, and it would have been 11 months in 5 days. I feel that he broke up with me for a completely different reason. I think that he just didn't like me or that he heard something bad about me or that he like someone else. I think that he should have waited because it was 3 days before Christmas and it completely ruined my holiday season. What should i do and what do u think?
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female
reader, anonymous, writes (3 January 2010): I think that he did what he felt was right. i do not agree, but that was his choice. You have to take care of you. I wish I could console you and make it better, but i cannot.
Be the best that you can be for you and realize he made the choice and did not give you a chance to well, know or get a clue of how he felt until now. If he felt you are just friends or whatever, let him not have you in his life and you take anytime you gave him and fill it with only positive situations.
Please do not waste your time as I have over and over again at age 48 and I have never been married. Value you and your life and how others treat you. Maybe he knows he is not worthy of you.... no matter whom he is or what he does.
Unless you just treatd him terribly, then again it takes two to tango. Hope you keep your head up and accept nothing less than healthy and good intentions.
A
male
reader, anonymous, writes (22 December 2009): to give him benefit of the doubt he may be broke and he can't afford buying Xmas presents. Young men can be silly like that. Try to find out if that is the reason.
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A
female
reader, birdynumnums  +, writes (22 December 2009):
 I have to agree with PeanutButter.
I think that guys think that if they aren't certain about a relationship, they like to break it off before Christmas, partly because of cheapness and partly because they don't want to be lying to someone about loving them over the holidays. So for him, he gets to have a really great relief over ending it and then he gets to enjoy Christmas feeling that same sense of relief.
That explains why he's done it and how he is feeling, so now you can relax and really hate the son-of-a-bitch for being such a totally selfish bastard by dumping you at this time of year.
If it makes you feel any better to hear that there are lots of schmucks just like your ex - my brother left his wife of 29 years and his two kids 4 days before Christmas for his mistress, mostly because the mistress put pressure on him to be with her - so consider the fact that you are lucky to be well-rid of him now - long before you ever had children and wasted a whole lifetime before being let down by the horse's butt.
You deserve better! Go out and be the life of the party this Christmas. Living well is the best revenge!
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A
female
reader, Emilysanswers  +, writes (22 December 2009):
One of my male friends wants to break up with his girlfriend at the moment.
I told him he couldn't break up with her just before xmas.
He said that it was either "just before Christmas which makes me a bastard. Just after New Years which makes me a bastard. Or just before Valentines day which makes me a bastard."
Your poor guy either had to hang on and lie to you till March, or just be honest and get it over with.
Yes, you'll be a bit sad over Xmas, but you'll be with your family any way, and then you'll have New Years and new start.
He really should have told you earlier, but it's better you know than carry on being lied to.
Good Luck!! xx
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A
female
reader, PeanutButter +, writes (22 December 2009):
 Some men, belive it or not, like to break up with women before Xmas so that they don't have to go to the families for lunch nor buy a present - if he tried to get back with you after xmas, take it as a warning! He's a cheap skate!
If he broke up with you because he's been feeling like this for 2 months though, he might well be telling the truth. Maybe he didn't want to drag it out for much longer, even if it means dropping you at Xmas!
I think you should try and enjoy your Xmas regardless and try to have a happy one. Don't let him spoil it for you. Be strong.
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