A
female
age
41-50,
anonymous
writes:I and him broke up 1 months ago. In that time I think very carefully and figured out that he is the love of my life. But after I stopped contact him one week then he called me last saturday but then after 30 minute talking very nice, he asked me giving him back the engagement ring. We had very lovely relationship. I totally fell in love with him and did too much things for him. He also was very nice and treat me very well but some misunderstanding and my uncontrol angry behavior turn him off. I said let's break up first because I was angry when he said I get the ring not because I love him, just because the ring cost 3000$.... Last saturday call, He said he's single now but he's interested with a girl who used to be a juicy girl. He agreed with me that we will wait until the anniversy day of our engagement to think well... But I think about if I give him the ring now with the word "your money have no meaning to me, you are the person meaningful to me", he may respect me and compare me and that girl (he always proud of me with his friends that I'm really nice girl and he's lucky because I don't smoke and don't drink, and never demand him for money or richness). I also have very good communication with his daughters. He said he scare of if we get married we will have end up the same way with his ex-wife (his ex-wife cheated on him and he catched her with other guy on his bed.....maybe because I'm actractive and popular girl or something?) But I don't understand how can he trust that juicy girl, her job is only letting a lot of different men touching her while I have master degree and having really good future in front of me. How can he think that juicy girl will not end up with him in the way his ex-wife did? And also Most of Phillipino juicy girls in Korea only try to be great to American men because of they want to get married and go to the state to get green card. My friend used to screw his life with two filipino woman. Lots of American men I know, their life or job sucks after get trouble with those kind of juicy girl. I'm trying to think that she may be a good person...because of I'm confused about should I try my best to get him back or just let him go with her and wish him the best and happiness.The thing is I never feel in love this way with anyone else(except my first love).Please give me an advice.... This Thursday will be the chance I can meet him.Should I just give him the ring and move on? should I give him a ring and be friend to wait for him?My heart is so hurt and broken now...Thanks in advance for answering.
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broke up, ex-wife, fell in love, his ex, money, move on Reply to this Question
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reader, anonymous, writes (30 May 2011): This is verified as being by the original poster of the questionI gave him back the ring and acted totally like I don't care at all then last saturday he started to show that he's interested in me. He came over try to talk but I kept the conversation being short. He keep walking pass me and one of my guy friend, looked at me.etc... I can see how much he eager to talk or know what's going on with me.
After that he drank a lot lot of beer and alcohol. I was very hurt but I still acted like I don't care. After I left there I cried so bad. Never want him being like this. Anyway, I believe that not long until I and him will get back with each other. The thing I'm worry now is that Juicy girl... I hope that's just a rebound relationship and he'll figure out soon.... I appreciate all of your advices. They helped me a lot. Thank you.
A
male
reader, Aurora Borealis  +, writes (24 May 2011):
whoah... sorry! I agree on the idea that it is not really neccesary to give back the ring, however, it might hold bad memories for you if you keep it... and this guy, sorry to say, does not seem someone to keep...
give the ring back and move on! this will always be something you will hold a grudge on! and, if I may be frank ... next time (and I am sure it will happen) you are given a ring make sure what it signifies - a token of frinedship? aks for a bracelet instead... a ring to show commitment? then, do! think long and hard abt if you really want this guy to be in your life for ever...
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A
female
reader, janniepeg  +, writes (24 May 2011):
 That juicy girl is some distraction. He knows that she is not marriage material, at least for him. So if nothing happens between them it's not a big deal. I believe this break up is a time for you to rethink things, and it's not a permanent one. When you get together you may tell him you still love him. You will work it through together. You don't give him the ring back until you are sure that the break up is forever. Just because he is afraid of love doesn't mean you have to withhold your love.
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A
female
reader, So_Very_Confused  +, writes (24 May 2011):
 Normally here in America an engagement ring is a gift and is not returned at the breaking of an engagement... unless it's a family heirloom... which does not seem to be the case here.If he's with a "juicy girl" then he's not being faithful to you and yet he's the one worried about you cheating.... interesting... sounds to me like he's "projecting' his behavior on you.so he's cheating on you. are you ok with that? personally it does not sound like this relationship is solid enough for the effort required to make it work properly.
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A
female
reader, kylieekristina +, writes (24 May 2011):
 Whether you give him the ring back or not, that shouldn't matter, you definetly need to tell him how you feel. Don't go on wondering what if!! Find out what it is he see's in this "juicy girl". Is it qualities you also hold or is it things you do not have in your personality make up?
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