A
female
age
30-35,
anonymous
writes: Me and my ex-boyfriend had a really stable relationship, that is until he kissed another girl and decided that because of it we couldn't be together "You deserve better" is what he said. The truth is I don't want better and I don't belive one kiss is worth ending everything for. Neither of us wanted the break up but his morals kept the decision sturdy. We both tried dating other people and even that didn't work out, for either of us. I'm still catch my breath when he talks to me, get butterflies when I hear from him, and it kills me to try and pretend that my feelings are strictly just friends now. Do I tell him that I'm still in love with him? I don't want to risk our friendship if he doesn't agree. I'm at a loss as to what to do.
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broke up, my ex Reply to this Question Share |
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reader, anonymous, writes (5 December 2008): I hope some of my translations help who ever reads this post.
These are the standard break up lines used by guys.
Its not you,Its me "means" Its you,not me
You deserve better "means" That girl was super hot and sexy.I deserve her.
I need some space "means" I need time to formulate a plan to win over that girl.If she doesn't fall for me,will get back to you.
At this moment,I don't know what I want "means" Heck.I definitely don't want you at the moment.
I wish I was good enough for you "means" I wish you were good enough for me.
Whatever bull he fed you,it doesn't change the fact that he broke up with you.He didn't choose to stay and work on your relationship.
I hope you are strong enough to tell him in his face,"yes darling!I deserve better.Thank you so much for realizing the truth".Hug him with so much exuberance.
Its about time we start playing their own game.What say?
A
male
reader, anonymous, writes (5 December 2008): You clearly have alot to learn about guys. It isn't his morals - he was looking for a way out of the relationship and found one. If he couldn't see himself with anyone else for the rest of his life, he would be begging for your forgiveness. Sorry.
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A
female
reader, nokutenda +, writes (5 December 2008):
if he wanted you he was going to apologize for what he did not tell you you deserve better.he is no longer interested, save yourself from more pain and move on
l once had a guy who used to say l deserve better,the truth it turned he no longer wanted me
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A
female
reader, cfemale +, writes (5 December 2008):
I think you should tell him how u feel, as you said you had a very stable relationship so he's sure to understand where you are coming from.
I'm not sure about his reason to call it off though, I mean these morals of his are a bit OTT. If he loved you, why would he want to end everything over just one kiss?
I'm trying to work through my relationship after my man cheated on me because the last thing he wanted to do was end it, he claimed he would do anything to make it work. It's not perfect for me, God knows I'm putting myself through hell when he's not in my company, constantly worrying but in saying that i knew that he wanted to save what we had before.
Your man should have wanted the same. Do you know the full extent of this kiss, does he still see this girl? did it go any further, maybe there's more to it! If so then he may want to move on with somebody else!
Hope fully it's not that way, but as long as you go on pretending about your feelings for him, u will be tormented, tell him, at least then you'll know where u stand, and if he doesn't feel the same you should not remain too close to allow yourself to move on and find somebody else or it might work out that he feels the same and can't tell you! and then both of you will be able to work on your relationship again.
I hope this helped, and wish u all the best
C
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A
reader, anonymous, writes (5 December 2008): To me it sounds like he was looking for a way out but is now regreting it. Try talking to him, tell him that you would like to try again but slowly go out on dates get to know each other again.
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