A
female
age
36-40,
*taunton5410
writes:Hi everyone, My boyfriend and I have been together for 10 months now and our relationship used to not be very good (fighting all the time) but lately it has gotten much better (were very loving and sweet). I noticed in the begining that he was a little on the jealous side because he had never loved any girl before or even had a long term relationship. Now there was one time where I walked our dog out to the mailbox and this guy came up to me and started talking to me about our puppy, he was just asking curious questions so I thought there would be no harm in answering him, well my BF saw that from outside the window and immediatley thought he was hitting on me and I was flirting back and not walking away. He has wondered so many times if I have ever cheated on him and I have sworn to him that I havent. Well the other day he picked me up from work so we could have lunch together, he said that he smelled mens cologne on me, but I told him that it was lotion that I had just put on my arms, he didnt believe me so the next day I let him smell the lotion and he apologized to me because that was indeed what he had smelled on me. I just need some advise on how to make my boyfriend trust me more, It was those tiny little thing where he thought I was cheating on him, like the lotion and the mailbox guy. I have never cheated on him and never will, I love him so much and he said the only reason why he acts like this is because he cares about me so much. Please tell me what I can do to prove to him that I am not a cheater and if a guy talks to me appropriately, he nor I are flirting with eachother.
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female
reader, cuddlyserenity  +, writes (14 July 2007):
 dump him!!!!no matter what you say or do to pacify him, it will never work. been there done that.its because he is full of insecurities and scared to lose you and he thinks by smothering you, he will keep you. at the moment, you can go and walk the dog alone, but eventually that will stop.you will lose your friends and in my case, your job and eventually become a recluse.it will get to the point that you will only have time to yourself when in the bathroom and even then, its not always private. he will check everything when he comes home and if something is out of place, in his mind, it means you have cheated. trust me on this, ive lived it for the past 11 years.
A
male
reader, NuVu +, writes (12 July 2007):
I think you've got to be a little cautious of a guy who gets jealous so easily. If you're a loving partner and show that to him regularly there isn't anything else you can do to convince him that you love him and are faithful to him. He needs to look deep inside and figure out why he's so insecure and why he seems to be lacking faith and trust in you. The problem is his, not yours. He needs to work on why he's feeling the way he does. If he doesn't he's gonna have a hard time having any kind of a loving relationship with anybody.
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A
male
reader, eddie  +, writes (12 July 2007):
 You can't prove you are not doing something. Something can only be proved when you're doing it. In other words, if he doesn't believe you, you can't do anything to put his mind at ease. For example, if he didn't hear the guy talking to you about the puppy, how could you prove what the guy said? You can't. You shouldn't have to prove anything either. You think it's cute now but in reality, this is the tip of the iceberg. Why do you let him accuse you of things and think it's OK. As for the men's cologne, what if you had given your co worker a hug because he was leaving the company? Would that indicate you're a cheater? No. Don't be controlled. The more you give in the more he'll thin he's justified.
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