A
female
age
,
anonymous
writes:I met this guy over 5 years ago when he was one of my employees. We talked everyday but never anything that I thought might lead to a relationship then or later. He was married and I respected that. I never though of him as a partner at all. After many years and a very bad marriage for me, I moved back into town where I first met him. He came into the business where I worked and once he recongized me he acted as if we were long lost lovers. He said he had often wondered what happend to me and he picked up and in his arms with a big hug and swung me around with glee. After that we begain talking alot about church, GOD, and life in general. He asked me to go to a christian concert with him and when I got to the church he told me he had invited several lady friends. That made me feel real uncomfortable but I stayed. Only 2 of us showed up and she and I became very good friends. This man has had more women in his bed than carter has liver pills BUT I still love him. Sick huh!!!He makes me feel as if he really cares for me but he now has gotten to the point to where he stays away from me when he becomes depressed due to his life style. I have stood by him when other women have tossed him to the curb. I guess I am his security blanket. I am loving, kind and very forgiving towards him. Please help me to understand why men treat women like this. He tells me and everyone we know that "He loves me but not the way I love him, that I am his best firned." He always come back to me when other women hurt him. HELP. Crazy for the wrong man
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female
reader, janniepeg  +, writes (8 May 2010):
 You want to be his surrogate mother? That's the kind of love you are showing him. Not even friends are that forgiving. Men treat women like this because they are still children inside and can't think beyond themselves.
A
male
reader, CaringGuy  +, writes (8 May 2010):
Not all men are like this. Actually there are a lot of men who don't do this. Just as there are women who use men in the same way, but not all women do it either.
You need to seriously sit down and work out what you want from your life. He's never going to commit to you. He'll always go out with other women, sleep with other women and get hurt by other women. And he'll always come back to you because he knows you'll put up with it. And then he'll leave again and you'll be hurt again and the cycle will continue until one day he won't come back and you'll just be hurt.
You have got to stop taking him back and allowing yourself to be his doormat. Surely you can see that he just uses you for his own ends. A man in love doesn't treat women like this, and you're wasting so much time on someone who doesn't care when you could be with a guy who will treat you a million times better.
You need to work out what you want from your life. Do you want to be this man's doormat until he finds a woman who will put up with him, or would you be better off cutting contact and moving on from him. There is no in between.
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