A
female
age
30-35,
anonymous
writes: Hi,my boyfriend broke up with me about two weeks ago after an 8 month relationship. He said it was better for both of us. Lately we've been having lots of arguments and he has anger management issues.At the beginning of this month, he slapped me because of something i said, but then he realized he shouldn't have done that so he called me everyday and even gave me gifts etc. He told me that he loved me etc. Although I forgave him and decided i still wanted to be with him, he then started to change recently, acting more cold towards me, not expressing his emotions. He asked for a break because he said he had a lot in his mind, so i gave him space. A few days later he said we shouldn't be together anymore, and said he wasn't sure how he felt about me. A week and half later, he saw me after class and started talking to me, and then he grabbed me and just kissed me and then he said he still had feelings for me, but he said he didn't want to use the word "love." We sort of made up that day, but then a few days after that, i called to see what was up and he said he wasn't sure again and had alot of work to do, so he wasn't gonna have time to see me. Then the next day, i sort of stopped him in the street and said hi, and then he called me cling etc. He told his friend that night that he simply wasnt interested in having a relationship anymore and that he was totally over me. I went on facebook and deleted him because i got frusturated/ mad. I still deeply care about him but i dont want to keep begging him. He doesn't call me or text me and acts like he hates me. I dont believe he's over me. I dont know what to do.
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female
reader, anonymous, writes (30 October 2010): he is over you. Domestic violence abusers keep looking for the wimp who will put up with his predictable abuse cycle. Without telling the world what a loser he is. Often abused women have to flee the relationship, covered in bruises, in the dead of the night. But lucky you - the relationship has ended without all that happening to you. Be very happy about it. He hit you. ''he's promised it will not happen again''. Wrong. He will do it again. And the level of violence will escalate. You would have been hurt more and more, if you had put up with it. He has classic anger management issues. His behaviour is abusive. He can be cold and unresponsive. He is going to find it hard to keep a girl. Pat yourself on the back that you are rid of him.
A
male
reader, soon567 +, writes (30 October 2010):
Your guy is unstable and really needs a professional counselor. I doubt he's in the right mind set for a relationship. A lot of women take abuse for years before the leave them. You need to walk away for good unless he agrees to get help. Your guy maybe bipolar in which the have medication for him.
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A
reader, anonymous, writes (30 October 2010): This man is simply a threat to your personal well being cause of his unstable, and potentially dangerous behavior. Therefore, it is absolutely necessary to protect this personal well being of yours by completely cutting him out of your life even if that means blocking any and all comunnications. Good luck.
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A
male
reader, CaringGuy +, writes (30 October 2010):
You need to walk away from him. Somewhere in his head, he has something wrong with him, and he needs to deal with that alone. What he's done is classic abusive behaviour, and perhaps that has spurred him to leave. We'll never know. But what we do know is that if you went back to him, you'd be in danger.
You need to block him, get rid of his numbers and get over this guy. He's just a danger to you.
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A
male
reader, Cerberus_Raphael +, writes (30 October 2010):
You can stop him from treating you this way and I think removing him from your Facebook friends list was the right thing to do. If he wishes to act coldly towards you, do the same to him. If he wishes to delude himself into thinking there is nothing between you two, so be it, treat him the same way. Move on from him and just ignore him.
I hope that helps.
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