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female
age
41-50,
anonymous
writes: Would you or have you ever asked your significant other to unfriend someone of the opposite sex on Facebook? For whatever reason, you did not want them associating with this person; jealousy or insecurity issues included among the reasons.Has your partner complied with your wishes? And if so, WHY?
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reader, anonymous, writes (15 April 2016): It's OP. Thank you for your answers. There are many different viewpoints. There is no right or wrong in my opinion.Ivyblue, LOL to your answer! It made me laugh. Thanks for that. I was going to suggest checking his friends to see if they are still on his friends list to make sure. But I have to say that I totally agree with both of you for making a mutual decision to give up Facebook. It can and does cause many relationship problems/break ups nowadays. People are just too accessible, all at your fingertips, and that is just asking for trouble and can be the match that lights the fire in many cases. And messenger is a colossal problem telling you exactly when somebody was active and yet from what I understand, active times are not even accurate. So you are always wondering what they are doing on FB at 3 in the morning or why they stayed on for a whole hour. Who were they talking to? What is going on? The app could have just been left open or the times were inaccurate or they were chatting with their Aunt Helen in Florida but you think it's with that woman in the short skirt from his office two years ago who he just friended. But we all jump to worst case. There is just way too much information which can be misused and misread.It creates way too much unnecessary drama. So I agree that if a husband or wife is REALLY bothered by someone the spouse friended and find them a THREAT, I think they are well within their rights to ask their spouse to unfriend. I think both partners have a responsibility to remove all threats from their relationship. If the spouse cares, they will understand and comply. They will not be upset or outraged or want to leave their spouse. The spouse feels uneasy about that person. And they could be right. That person could be reaching out to start something with your spouse. Mind you, there are other ways to keep in touch other than FB but it just shows good faith on your partner's end to eliminate the threat that you perceive the other person to be. And it shows they care enough about you to do this. And conversely, it also shows you care enough about them to ask them to do this.
A
female
reader, Ivyblue  +, writes (14 April 2016):
 Yes because the chit chat was flirty. Yes he did, well I think he did, bloody well better have anyway lol. No seriously, he was cool he understood because when asked if he would like it he said no. For us, we gave up FB all together. No biggy
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A
female
reader, anonymous, writes (14 April 2016): No, I would never ask my boyfriend to unfriend anyone, especially not on social media. However, if it is my wish for him to unfriend someone, he would have no problem doing so.
You see, you must respect and trust your significant other. Besides it's just a friend on social media, should in no way come in between your relationship with him.
If you are jealous and insecure, I would suggest to post more sweet photos of the both of you. Post sweet messages on his page and encourage him to so the same on your page. I personally don't feel the need for that, but if it helps to 'secure things' between you and your boyfriend, why not give it a try.
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A
female
reader, Honeypie  +, writes (13 April 2016):
 No.
My husband has his ex-wife and his HS sweetheart on his Facebook and I have no problem with that. While I don't particularly like his ex-wife, she is the mother of his 2 oldest children, but more importantly.. I TRUST him to not behave in a deceitful or detrimental to our marriage way.
We have been together for 20 years, and I DO not believe it's MY job as his wife to tell him 1. whom he can befriend or 2. how to behave. It's NOT my job to "raise" him. He should KNOW how to behave and what's acceptable in a marriage. In OUR marriage.
I think instead of trying to DICTATE to a partner whom they can't talk to/interact with - I think it's WAY more important to talk boundaries, to BE on the same page.
Jealousy is a sure way to ruin a relationship, just like inappropriate behavior is.
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A
female
reader, wrathykins  +, writes (13 April 2016):
 Yes, I did many times. I felt that some girls were really over the top with him and I am quite a jealous person. He unfriended them etc. to make me happy and to stop me getting upset...
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A
female
reader, aunt honesty  +, writes (13 April 2016):
 No I would never ask my partner to do this because I trust him completely.
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A
female
reader, anonymous, writes (13 April 2016): I never asked my boyfriend to but he did so anyway because he knew there were girls I thought were too flirty with him. I felt bad about it at first even though I never asked him too but in the long run I feel much better and secure because he put my feelings first.
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A
male
reader, BrownWolf  +, writes (13 April 2016):
If you have any issues of Jealousy or insecurities....you need to unfriend those issues out of your life.
If you can trust your partner, then you need to do one of three things..
1) Get a partner you can trust.
2) Never date again, because the opposite sex will always be an issue.
3) Jealousy and insecurities will destroy and relationship...get those out of your life.
I will never ask my partner to do something so foolish.
If there was a lot of guys checking out my partner...AWESOME !!! No why?? I got something they don't have. Guess who is going to bed with her tonight? So while you are loving your hands, I would be loving the real thing.
So what is there to be jealous or insecure about??
I would be treating my partner the way I want to be treated myself...even better than myself....So...Go fool around...please...Hope the other guy treats you better. Because I never go backwards.
I know who I am, and if my partner was not happy with that, and wanted someone else...GO...please...And hurry up ! You are cutting in on my dating time.
The moment you feel you are not worth it, then you start living it. As long as your heart beats...you are worth it.
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