A
male
age
30-35,
*eeney
writes:i met this girl 8 months ago and we have been going out for the past 6 months. i loved her and she loved me back, we had a great relationship we really cared about each other's feelings. we both had never been in a relationship before she is 24 and i am 22. everything was going perfect, i had just moved in with her. we went out on xmas eve and i got into a bit of an altercation with this guy over nothing we were both really drunk. after it was over i said i was sorry and she said it was ok but she was just really scared of the situation.i went with her on xmas day to her parents house, i made sticky date pudding with butterscotch sauce and accendenly spilled it walking in the house trying not to let the dog outside. she was pretty angry with me at the time but she said she knew it was an accident.i have been working the whole time i had been with her but after xmas i had no work so i had to budget my money, i told her all this before i moved up and she said that it was ok we will get through it. she had just started a job that she really wanted and i was in a job that i didnt like.on news years eve after everyone was really drunk i again accidently spilled a little bit of aclohol on the floor and proceeded to clean it up her dad went off at me over it. after this she became very distant didnt want to come home and when she did she said it was probably better if we didint live together at the moment.so after a couple of days i found somewhere else to go and stay i seen her before i left and we had a very good conversation i asked her if she wanted to break up she said no.i spoke to her a two days later and she told me she kissed a guy at a party but her friend egged her on. i was pretty upset but said i could forgive her as i know she was very confused at the time a couple of days later she asked me to come over and see her and she said that she wanted to give this a go.that following weeekend she went away for work and had her xmas party that night she was speaking to a guy about me and he kissed her. she came back on the monday and said it was over i packed more of my things and left. she told me that she needed space and that she cares about me and still wants me in her life but not as her partner. and that she would forever cherish the the time we had together but it just wont work out anymore and she couldnt see a future with us.i spoke to her on the phone the next day and asked her what she was going to do with the tickets to a comedy festival that we were sopposed to go to together she said i could come if i wanted but she thought it might be awkward with her work friends going.she also told me she had to leave work because she couldnt stop crying, i saw her a few days later i wrote a letter saying i was sorry and i wanted to give her the space and time she needed but still wanted to be with her. when i seen her she smiled and hugged me we spoke for about half an hour she told that it was over but then walked me to my car gave two big hugs and said goodbye i seen her housemate and she said that she has been home all week and when she had she has been crying.i know she still cares on some level about me. i want to give her space but it is really hard because i am missing her like crazy and i cant seem to forget all the good times we had together and then i realize that it is over.she said she needs time to herself and be single but she doesent want to lose me and does not know down the track if we could get back together. do i let her have her space? what if she finds someone else and forgets all about me? i love her with all my heart. i have fixed some of the problems she stated already its only been a week since the break up i changed my status too single and she hasn't.do i wait for her to call me? she said she would when she is ready but she wants to get over me first. and she wants to be friends. i cant lose her she is my best friend and the best thing to ever happen to me.
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best friend, drunk, get back together, money, moved in Reply to this Question
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Fancy yourself as an agony aunt? Add your answer to this question! A
reader, anonymous, writes (21 January 2013): Hi, it sounds like she has done more than kiss another guy and knows that there is no hope for a reconcilation.
My conclusion is based on the fact that she says its over but keeps crying. If she really wanted to work or thought there was hope she would try building a relationship with you even though yourll are not together.
Let her go and move on as you deserve someone that can love and appreciate you.
A
male
reader, Tom Obler  +, writes (21 January 2013):
 Hi,
I think the best thing you can do is to let her have her space. She has asked for it so let her have it. Do not go into what ifs or what might happen or other guys. Just simply distance yourself and let her have her space. If she wants you, she will be back in touch. By keep being in her life at the moment, you would only be making things worse. Let her be and wait for her to reply. This I would say is your best option. I hope it works for you.
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