A
female
age
51-59,
anonymous
writes: Hi,Have been married for over 20 years.2 years ago husband started working away from home. Was very lonely and turned to chatting on the internet.Met a man. He was everything I could have wanted. And sex was wonderful. Short story my husband found out and everything blew up and I realised the other man wasn't as wonderful as he made out.Unfortunately after having such great sex I am now addicted to finding anyone. In the last 18 months have met people off the internet and had sex with over 20 different men. I want to stop but cant.Haven't made love with my husband in months.I really don't know what to do. I cant see me every stopping and am worried sick, but at the same time cant get enough.
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female
reader, Olivia(Y). +, writes (15 March 2009):
This isn't fair on your husband that loves you.
Just think to yourself, hes loved you for 20 years and your repaying him by sleeping with men you have met on the internet.
We all get lonely when our partener is away but you have got to stop yourself from sleeping with other men. You can put a block on all dating sites on your pc which may help.
Delete all the numbers of these guys off your phone.
You need to talk to your husband saying you are missing out on sex. Set days when he is home when you will have sex and try new things to make your sex life more enjoyable.
I would also advise you to see a therapist about your problem. Don't be scared to go to them about this because they see this everyday. They will help you put your life back on track and give you ways to improve your relationship with your husband.
Good luck
Livia
xx
A
male
reader, Danielepew +, writes (15 March 2009):
Where I live, most married men have sex on the side. They are married, like I said, but sex with a new person, the thrill of seduction, et cetera, are always appealing. These men don't meet their new partners over the internet, but that is irrelevant. Some of these men stop seeing other people when their wives find out. Most of these men, however, continue for as long as possible. And that is because we humans enjoy sex, and because they choose to continue.
On this basis, I believe that, if you want to stop, all you need to do is stop, simply. It would be difficult, but it can be done.
I don't think you're sick. You just enjoy this so much and don't want to stop. You have realized that this fun comes at a price, and now are wondering what to do. Only you can choose.
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A
reader, anonymous, writes (15 March 2009): You have a problem that requires professional help! Find yourself a good therapist. You have admitted and accepted that you have an addiction. Now the next step is to take action. Seek help before something terrible happens!
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