A
male
age
30-35,
anonymous
writes: my girlfriend broke up with me over three months ago and is till have feelings for her and dont like that the misunderstanding that ended our relationship.While i am conflicted on whether or not i should even like her still and hold out till she breaks up with her new boyfriend, i would like to ask the obvious question of: has anyone ever had success with going back out with an ex before? or does it just end with the same problems or new problems because of past tension?While she said she wouldnt go out with me again, i wonder if i could convince her to because i have before, considering she hated me all throughout high school and then ended up "loving" me because i was actually a nice guy once she got to know me. but should i even try? or will i just experience the same heartbreak again.she is a great girl for the most part, though we had our disagreements. she was the first person who didnt mind i was kinda weird and shy.
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male
reader, Ven +, writes (17 October 2010):
It works for some. Sometimes the original reason they split becomes a non-issue and they can move forward from that. Sometimes both people can grow separately to a point that they come back different people and can make it work.
But what usually happens is that people miss what they had so much that they take opportunity to jump right back into a relationship, without growing or learning at all. And those people are generally all screwed.
So what you need to focus on is becoming a more mature and satisfied person. If you aren't happy with your body, take the time to join a gym or get physical work or exercise. If you aren't happy with your job, take a chance and do something different. If you have talents that go in-hand with long-time dreams or goals, pour yourself into those for a while. The end result is that you will have done more of the things you have wanted to, your self-confidence goes through the roof, and you will be able to be honest with her and yourself, and not make stupid decisions based on feelings you haven't dealt with months ago.
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