A
male
age
36-40,
*enfold
writes:for a married couple to be together forever they should grow together and not grow apart.What is your definition of "grow together" and/or "grow apart"? give examples if possible Reply to this Question
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Fancy yourself as an agony aunt? Add your answer to this question! A
female
reader, kirra07  +, writes (18 September 2010):
haha, I hope so too. And we don't read the some book together (that'd be really sweet, we do it sometimes but rarely). We just both read different books at the same time. And sometimes if we've both read them, we'll talk to each other about it or tell each other a funny part we're reading.
I think some sort of common interest is necessary. People have such variety of interests, that chances are there will be a bit of overlap. Enough that you can watch shows or movies together or read together, or play games or sports together. Something that you can both enjoy doing together. Because otherwise it's hard to stay connected if you don't do things and share things together.
I know I've heard the opposites attract thing, but we are attracted to things that are familiar and common. Someone who can connect to. Doesn't mean we have to be identical or so similar, just something that ties us together.
A
male
reader, tenfold +, writes (17 September 2010):
tenfold is verified as being by the original poster of the questionthat is so sweet of you. wish you and your mate be forever together.
that means in order to grow together we should find someone who is of similar interest? that way we can show interest?
Some say that its good to find someone with different interest.. not sure why they said it.
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A
female
reader, kirra07 +, writes (17 September 2010):
To be honest, I'm not really sure how to answer this, because I feel like I'm still in the process of figuring this out. But I'd like to know the answer to this too, and will put my best guess about it.
I think that growing together is keeping connected, nurturing the things that you have in common, and being supportive in the things that you don't.
- so talking about your days, your work, what you did
- showing interest
- doing things that you have in common together (read together, watch shows, movies, sports, hiking, cooking, whatever)
- listen to what the other person is interested in and support them in their pursuit of it
Also, taking the time to spend quality romantic time together. Having date nights where you try to treat each other the way you used to, instead of the comfortable way that you get used to after so long.
I know sometimes I wonder if me and my bf are growing apart. We've been living together for about a year now. And we're really comfortable around each other. And if we go to restaurants, we'll read at the table together. Sometimes I wonder if we should be looking into each other's eyes and talking and being all lovey dovey. But we read and look at each other occasionally and talk in between. And it's companionable.
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