A
female
age
30-35,
anonymous
writes:Hi, my boyfriend and I have discussed having sex and agreed that while we both would like to have sex with eachother there isn't a pressure on either of us to do it.This is fine , however a few days ago we were in a position where we were going to have sex , but stopped because we didn't have a condom. Even though I am on the pill , I would have felt more comfortable if we used a condom because I've not been on it long enough for it to be fully effective.Basically I'm just wondering if it would be sluttish or presumptouous of me to carry a condom if I was going to be staying over night with him , especially as I'm a virgin?Although my boyfriend and I have talked about it a little , I don't want to bring it up alot or make it seem like I'm expecting to have sex that day or night. So I'm wondering if it would seem presumtous of me to carry some in my bag sometimes?Sorry if this is a really pointless question!
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condom, the pill Reply to this Question
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reader, anonymous, writes (11 July 2010): This is verified as being by the original poster of the questionHi , thank you so much for all the help! =)
Just thought I'd say I took your advice , bought condoms (very nearly fainted from embarassment) and did the deed.
My boyfriend (who it turned out had started to carry condoms)seemed really happy that I was being 'responsible' and everything worked out nicely.
THANK YOU!
A
female
reader, Gabrielle Stoker  +, writes (2 July 2010):
 Of course you should carry condoms. It's the sensible thing to do. I don't think it's slutty either, though some might have a different perspective. The thing to remember is; would you rathe be known as slutty or get pregnant/received an STD?
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A
male
reader, Universe Man +, writes (2 July 2010):
Carrying a condom to have sex with your boyfriend is in no way slutty or promiscuous. You've already shown good judgment by waiting, and carrying a condom would just be more good judgment. In fact, carry several. Good for you.
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A
female
reader, Blue Sahara +, writes (2 July 2010):
 Carrying condoms is no more sluttish then being on the pill. They are both forms of birth control.
You are in a relationship with a guy, you have had a conversation about sex, you have gone on the pill so you guys can have sex, you were over at his house and almost had sex...if a guy is surprised by you breaking out a condom then he needs help!
Sometimes guys don't have condoms simply because they don't want to use them. A lot of guys don't like the feelings of them. But, not even going into STD's, they aren't the ones who have to carry the baby. There is nothing wrong with you telling him to keep some at his place also. Even if he resets at first, he will definitely keep them around if it's the only way he is going to get sex. He will go and buy the 100 count box at Costco if it's the only way he is going to get sex!
But there is nothing wrong with carrying condoms. If you feel weird about it, they even make compact mirrors that have a hidden compartment to hide the condom. So you aren't the only woman who feels weird about it.
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A
female
reader, heart-shaped-balloon +, writes (2 July 2010):
 No way, love.
If you are a sexually active adult in this day and age, you need to be responsible. Keeping away from pregnancy is a responsibility that does not just lay in the hands of the man, but you as well.
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A
female
reader, anonymous, writes (2 July 2010): I don't think it's slutty or presumptuous at all (especially since you are in a relationship). In fact I think it's very responsible that: 1-you and your boyfriend have sat down and discussed sex 2-you want to protect yourself.
I think it would be more than reasonable for you to carry condoms. You don't even have to tell him that you have them, but I am sure that he will be more than happy to find out if things progress to that level!
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A
female
reader, veronika  +, writes (2 July 2010):
 Carrying condoms isn't "sluttish", it's quite responsible.
If you feel uncomfortable with him knowing you have condoms, he doesn't necessarily need to know you're carrying them -and neither does anybody else. Just keep them discreetly in your wallet or bag, if you feel the need to be discreet.
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