A
male
age
51-59,
anonymous
writes:my girlfriend is pregnant with my baby. she went to jail and she has fallin in love with a 40 year old gay chick in jail. now she says she is going to raise my baby with her when she gets out. what should i do?
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reader, anonymous, writes (5 October 2009): apply for custody, you would win hands down.
A
female
reader, HereAreMyTwoCents +, writes (5 October 2009):
 No one ever goes through life thinking that one day they may have to ask someone for advice about their girlfriend falling in love with a gay chick in jail! It seems almost surreal, doesn't it? But so is life, expected the unexpected. Unfortunately, there is no device invented to detect whether or not a future girlfriend will turn into a lesbian while serving time. If there was such a thing, the world would be a much less stressful place to live in! My first gut reaction would be to say what someone else on here said... just give her time to snap out of this looniness, to come to her senses, and she'll come back to you. But, just in case she doesn't, just in case she has somehow suddenly found her true sexuality, you have to be prepared for that scenario, too. Either way, the one thing that IS A GIVEN in this entire unpredictable situation, is that you two will soon have a child together, so that is the thing you need to concentrate on the most, is the well being of the child, and like someone else said, gain as much legal ground on custody as possible.
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A
reader, anonymous, writes (5 October 2009): What should you do? Doesn't sound like there's much you can do... first she's simply your GF, so you can't even divorce her. Assuming that she's not pulling some BS story to try to get you to move on (and assuming that she's getting out 'soon'...) let's assume that she's made up her mind that this is how it is.Your only obligation is to the baby- assuming it's yours and I would NOT have my name of the birth certificate until I had a DNA test, our you could be screwed for the next 20+ years. Demand a test, and alert the authorities that you do not want to be on the birth certificate at the time of birth.I'd stop all monitary support for the GF, exGF, and start saving moeny for the child, in the event you are the dad. If she has stuff at your house, have her parents come get it, if they're not around, I'd rent a mini-warehouse, pay the minimum rent and let her empty it out when she's out. Make the move 30 days from when she's due to be out and mail her the combination. No need to come by your place and say 'howdy'...I'd move, change my phone numbers and email address and get a TRO. Now, what can you do about the rearing of the child? We'll, gee, Mom appears to be a model mother... oh, wait, my Mom never did time... nor was she hooked up with a bull-dyke she met while she was 'in'. I'd get my act together, make a safe and wonderful place for the child and spend alot of money to gain as much legal ground as I can. If you can get full custody, and want it... and are willing to fight like hell to get a judge to agree that the father should get custody, then go for it. If your lucky, Mom will remain the mess that she was prior to going to jail and will repeat her mistakes, which you could document and use a evidence that she's unfit. If you take this route it's going to be long, hard and likely expensive, but you ahve a child in this mix that needs the best care that it can have- hopefully, your a better choice than Miss-wonderful.
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