A
male
age
26-29,
*lfonzo
writes:Im 15 and i love my pe teacher but he never seems to notice me, my friend caught me staring at him in the cafateria and i had to spill my guts and she just told me its a phase and i'll get over it.but i know its not and i really want him both in a relationship and sexually :/ how do i get him to notice me/ fall in love with me?P.S im gay btw and im pretty sure he is as well and he is single
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reader, anonymous, writes (21 November 2011): You missed the point, yum yum. They didn't say him being gay was a phase, his friend said that having feelings for his teacher was a phase. Straight or gay, it's still something that alot of students go through. I say to you to focus on finding a nice boyfriend. Then you won't be focused on your teacher.
A
male
reader, yum yum  +, writes (25 October 2011):
 There is no such thing as a "phase" when it comes down to your sexual orientation. Many gays in denial use that pretext as an excuse for not acting upon their sexuality. I'm a gay 26 year old. I began having feelings for guys in my school at the age of 13 , it was never a phase. My many gay acquaintances and friends attractions were never a phase either. However as many grew up over the years, they kept it in denial because they always believed it was a "phase" even until they reached there mid 20s,30s,40s and even 50s. Don't let any homophobic suppress your feelings by telling you its a phase. You need to be free to accept yourself for who you are and live for you are. The sooner you can do that the better. Nothing will happen between you and your PE teacher because of the circumstances. It would cause a lot of trouble. Wait until you find somebody else with less obstacles in the way.
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A
female
reader, fi_the_tree +, writes (23 October 2011):
 Two words... RAGING HORMONES!
You can't make your teacher fall in love with you, you can't make anyone fall in love with you. You'll look back on this in years to come and think "What the hell was I thinking???"
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A
female
reader, The Girl with the Diver's Hair +, writes (22 October 2011):
Okay alot of people say they "love" their teahcer but honestly. They don't!!! seriously it is a phase. Even if its not and he did feel the same he couldnt do anything about it because you under 18 and its illegal.
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A
female
reader, Abella  +, writes (22 October 2011):
Dear Alfonzo
I am sure that your PE teacher loves his job dearly. He studied long and hard to get that job and he wants to keep that job.
whether he is gay or not, he knows that one false move on his part and he could lose his job. and end up ruining his career. It is a very difficult occupational job hazard for teachers.
The girl at school, who you mentioned, cannot give you wise counsel. I would expect that, to a gay male, developing a crush on a man is not a phase, but is part of being gay.
You most certainly can seek wiser counsel than that girl who dismissed your feelings asa phase, so quickly.
I do understand that when your thoughts are consumed over this attractive PE teacher it must be very distracting for you.
But in this instance it is not just about you.
Your teacher may or may not be gay.
He may or may not admire you.
And he may or may not care about you.
But if you have an ounce of care and compassion for him then I am sure that you would not want to ruin his career?
Even if you are about to turn 16 you are still of an age, 15, where you cannot even legally contemplate a sexual relationship, even if this PE teacher worked at a different business and not a school. The Law is tough on this and uncompromising. Society expects the innocent to be protected.
Teachers and persons employed in a school - men and women - have ended up in gaol for violating laws pertaining to inappropriate conduct with students.
Surely you care about this PE teacher enough to wait until you have left school,and until you are an adult, in a legal sense, before approaching this man you are crushing for?
More and more, schools are taking action against inappropriate sexual conduct by teachers, as they should. Students have a right to be protected from inappropriate conduct
Teachers who are doing the right thing also need to remain vigilant in the face of students who may wish to ignore the law and put the teacher at risk.
I have included two sets of information. One set it support for Gay individuals – you may find these links useful
http://emptyclosets.com/forum/support-advice/5962-gay-support-helplines-etc.html
The LIKE ME Organization
"To provide support, resources and education to LGBT individuals, and their families and friends."
http://likeme.org/
www.Pflag.org - for families and friends to support gay people
the second list is the consequences that result from inappropriate conduct at school by teachers. I hope this underlines how important it is that you respect your PE teacher’s boundaries please
http://wn.com/Former_high_school_teacher_sentenced
http://antimisandry.com/female-paedophiles/female-predators-big-list-still-incomplete-11434.html
http://itcanhappeninyourschool.blogspot.com/2007_06_01_archive.html.
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A
male
reader, AvgGuy1 +, writes (22 October 2011):
 Well, I don't know about laws in the UK, but here in the states it's illegal for someone over 18 to have relations (physical) with someone under 18... And it's highly unethical and very frowned upon for teachers to have relations with their students. You could endanger his career... So if you really really like him... You should wait until you graduate and go off to uni.
I know that's hard to hear... But that's just the way these types of situations fall out.
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