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female
reader, anonymous, writes (16 July 2013): he has stayed because he wants to get his green card.
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female
reader, AuntyEm +, writes (15 July 2013):
He stayed with you just to get the green card and probably the sex!!
Yes...some people really ARE that low!!...and others are gullible!!
Dump him, find someone better!
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reader, anonymous, writes (15 July 2013): This is verified as being by the original poster of the questionThank u so much for ur wonderful suport. I feel blessed that sonehow i found this forum.i was never person who wanted make business on relathionship. I felt like since we are so long toghether u obviously want this other half to be happy and leave in peace. I knew that being illigal immigrant is very difficult and stresful.and since we are couple i thought getting married and help him is right way to do. But the other half of me was saying that this is business for him. And last nite he confirmed that.i was affraid to say no and i thoght it would be mean. But i see that you guys think that to which makes me more confident and secure whit thoughts i had. Thaaaank
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reader, anonymous, writes (15 July 2013): This is verified as being by the original poster of the questionTo answer ur q. When we decided that we will get married for gc he said marriage nothing change in our relationship. Reason for y we didn't wanted to get married when we met is ; we both did b4 and it didn't woked out. So when we met 7 years ago we discuss it and we borh agreed that we do not need piece of paper to be happy.at some point and after leaving together 5 years we decided to get married just to help him ligalize status.What i am expecting? I do not understand why he was with me for five years and he was hidinfrom me that half of the time he is wondering what is he doing with me??? I do not care about getting married i never did. I do not understand y he was with me 5 years, he knew i dont want to get married as well as he didn't he could leave any time... any time were just couple leaving together and he never left???? Y??? Y leave with other person for 5 years and half of time bit myself up what i am doing with this person? If i woyld be just 50% in in relationship longer than feq months that would mean to me that its not a right person to me. Y he stayed 5 years??? Now he didn't say we braking up or anything as well?? I do not understand?? I am in usa myself since i was 19. I feel lonely or confus sometimes. I had really bumpy road before i got where i am. but i made it i am proud of myself.never nothing hurt me as much as this few words he said. I still didn't leave my room.do u have any idea why he was 5 years in relationship with me and didn't leave even all this time he was wondering what is he doing with me?
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female
reader, anonymous, writes (15 July 2013): Dump his sorry ass!
Get yourself a real boyfriend, who is blessed to be with you, not "wondering what he is doing with you". He can find someone else to give him that green card.
Find happiness, and he isn't it. Sleeping in separate rooms, he sleeps while you ponder his hurtful words.
Anyone deserves better than that!
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female
reader, anonymous, writes (15 July 2013): Do not marry him. perhaps live together for another year or so, then see how it goes.
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reader, anonymous, writes (15 July 2013): Don't get married to him.
You have far too much to lose.
He really doesn't sound like he is 100 percent sure that he wants to be married to you.
He is doing it for his family and for the green card.
Those are not good reasons to make a lifetime commitment to someone.
If his heart is not in it your marriage will not work and you'll find yourself going through the emotionally and financially taxing process of divorce.
What have you got to gain from this marriage? Nothing. Don't do it.
Keep living with him if it makes you happy but don't make a legally binding commitment with someone who's not sure they like having you around.
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female
reader, AuntyEm +, writes (15 July 2013):
Ok let me get this straight
You been together 5 years
Neither of you wanted to get married
He has told you he doesn't know why he's with you
You are marrying him so he can get a green card
He's told you he could find another girl
???
He's marrying you for the green card...what else were you expecting?
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male
reader, Sageoldguy1465 +, writes (15 July 2013):
"Sounds", to me, like he's using you for the coveted green card...
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