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anonymous
writes: I stopped sleeping with FWB recently because he insulted me. He said I wanted more and was into drama because I questioned him about a woman that was in his vehicle (ex wife) because they had to take care of a bank issue. Not questioning WHY she was in the car, I knew why. Questioning because SHE picked up the phone and she said hello? He said "xxxxx" wanted to say hello. Later that day I asked him why he let her pick up the phone when he could clearly see it was me? He said he told her not to but of course she did it anyway. But I'M the drama person? So he said we can't be friends, it's not working out because I want more. I Haven't talked to him since. Been a week. Really miss him but I don't think I was wrong. thoughts? Reply to this Question
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female
reader, anonymous, writes (22 October 2023): Thank you all so much for the feedback. Even though I know it's time to let him go, it still hurts. We've been friends for 30 years, (not fwb), so it's like loosing someone you love very much.
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female
reader, Youcannotbeserious  +, writes (21 October 2023):
 Sweetheart, he has shown you exactly where you stand. When someone does this, you need to listen and take note. The only way you can walk away from this with any pride is to let it go NOW and move on, even if he changes his mind and contacts you again. If you go back, he will only do the same again - drop you like a hot potato as soon as you become inconvenient in any way.
You are worth more. Find a man who values you for a lot more than just casual no-strings sex.
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reader, mystiquek  +, writes (20 October 2023):
 FWB relationships rarely work out because one person cant just leave it for what its supposed to be...sex only. Its pretty natural but doesnt bode well for the fwb aspect. Someone is always going to get hurt. I honestly don't know how people can be in a FWB. Years ago I was in one, but from the very start, I knew I felt much more than the guy did. I tried so hard to be perfect..everything the guy wanted always hoping..hoping that his feelings would grow into love for me. They never did and I just grew more and more desperate and he got angry at me because I wanted more than he ever wanted to give. I had to save myself and walk away. If you want love..then NEVER settle for just sex!
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reader, anonymous, writes (19 October 2023): Actually in this situation he's right - you created drama out of nothing.
In all honesty, I think he sure knows how to pick you - his ex was also in that situation a drama queen - taking and answering is phone. And your reaction was exactly what she wold have done if she had been in your shoes.
So, you are who you are and he picked you to be FWB with.
So I guess yu all deserve each other.
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male
reader, anonymous, writes (18 October 2023): You may not have written the title, but he's right: you do want more! He let his ex talk to you to show you that "yes, there's woman I do things other than sex with and you're not one of them". You are about drama because you're in his business when you have no right to be - you're just sex, no more. Learn your place.
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reader, Honeypie +, writes (18 October 2023):
 You want more from your FWB, he doesn't so he created a situation that made you upset.
FWB is more often than not a BAD idea.
Friends should remain friends, not someone you sleep with cause you are single, horny or bored.
If you want to DATE someone who is a friend, be upfront BEFORE you have sex. Wait with the sex until you both are on the same page - IF he is also interested in dating you. Otherwise, you will just end up feeling used for sex.
I think you and your "friend" are wasting your time on each other.
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male
reader, kenny +, writes (18 October 2023):
 In all honesty in my opinion if someone is just a FWB you are not really in a place to question what they are doing or who they are with.
By your own admission you said you knew who he was with and what he was doing, so why did you feel the need to ask.
I think you both need to sit down and have a chat about where you both go from here, as I'm sure you don't want to be a FWB for ever.
Ok its been a week, why don't you call him, text him. If you feel like its going nowhere then I would refrain from contacting him and move on.
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female
reader, anonymous, writes (18 October 2023): Yes you were wrong. You clearly want a lot more than just sex and casual and to him it is breaking the agreement, boring and hassle. You go on about him now, when it is just fwb you just walk away and move on, you don't keep thinking about it and wanting them back. That proves it is a lot more, but there was other proof in other things you nit picked at about him and how he lives his life - it is none of your business. He can see who he wants, when he wants for what he wants, he can let people answer his phone, he does not have to explain it to you. If you interrogate someone they walk away, you are no fun. He only wanted you for fun. Not hassle. Not interrogations. In fact you are worse than a lot of women would be if married to him committed to him, living with him. Don't do fwb if you are clingy and needy, the two do not go together. It is going to end up with them dumping you.
If you can see the truth behind the words and give good advice to people about their (so called) relationships join us at askagonyauntsadviceonline.com and earn good money advising your clients through this site. You can also get free advice here.
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reader, anonymous, writes (18 October 2023): The problem is you've attached to him, whilst he categorised you as his one of many option... this means he's not truly commited to you!
He likely thought in his masculine biology that you'd be ok with this, since he would be as a male that doesn't attach onto females in the same way that we do to men, as women.
You are bound to miss him, because you're are attached to him and have bonded in a way that testosterone wouldn't have that impact on him towards you.
He's not committed basically and isn't in love with you. Nor is he likely to be, as you've allowed for him to have sex with you and haven't expected any type of commitment beforehand.
You have done the right thing by choosing to no longer sleep with him, because at least you will no longer allow yourself to be used.
This is a good thing, because he would have only of kept you around as a sex option, but of his one and only type of woman showed up in his life, he would have left you with little to no thought.
In future, you need to understand that we do attach to the opposite sex, without having sex at all!
Men produce 300 million sperm per day, so they are hard wired to seek sex! Will only commit to a woman emotionally if they have fallen in love with their one and only.
Which is why you need to build the emotional attraction and connection; you test men out with the right type of playful banter...
Men will fall in love with certain women and you need to do everything in your power to avoid men categorising you as their sex only option.
Can never win once they have categorised a woman that way, subconsciously. It never changes in a man's mind.
You now have the opportunity to heal and find someone worth the time of day in the future...
Just avoid thinking that sex is the way to a man's heart, because sex is a cheap commodity in a man's mind.
Own your power and never settle for less that your highest aspirations and dreams,
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