A
male
age
,
anonymous
writes:My girlfriend won't have penetrative sex with me, although we enjoy other forms of intimacy. She gives excuses like soreness, or thrush, but even on the few occasions I have started full sex she doesn't allow me complete entrance.I'm a 67 years old normally proportioned man. I crave full intimacy. I love her very much and she has called me a gentle and sensitive lover. She recognises I have needs, but I don't like our love making to be one sided.My suggestions that she see a doctor or simply asking her what's going on are side stepped.Can anyone shed light on this syndrome? We have been together four years. I thought things would become more relaxed as time went on. Reply to this Question
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reader, anonymous, writes (3 September 2015): This is verified as being by the original poster of the questionThanks for all your contributions. I think I will tackle the medical option first and try to suggest a visit to the GP.
A
female
reader, So_Very_Confused  +, writes (2 September 2015):
 IF she has gone through menopause then it's possible that intercourse is painful for her but she does not wish to admit it or know that there are meds for it.
Some women with menopause get a thinning of the vaginal walls that causes extreme pain and tightness when having intercourse even if they use good lubrication.
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A
female
reader, mystiquek +, writes (2 September 2015):
 I can only guess but perhaps she wants and needs companionship but doesn't like or want sex. My mother is 78 and has a boyfriend and she says they are intimate but she says she would be just as happy if they just cuddled and snuggled. She says she lost interest in sex about 15 years ago. There isn't much you can do if your lady refuses to discuss the matter. You either have to accept that sex just isn't going to be a part of your relationship, or you move on. I'm sorry!
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A
reader, anonymous, writes (2 September 2015): This is verified as being by the original poster of the questionThanks for your answers so far. I don't think it can be an ongoing STD after 4 years, but there may have been one before me. Also I use protection.
My girlfriend tells me she loves me, but in some ways doesn't want to commit. She is independent and won't accept financial help in any way, even if I suggest some sort of repayment scheme.
I feel she is keeping herself slightly at a distance. A previous break up with another man hurt her deeply.
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A
female
reader, WhenCowsAttack +, writes (2 September 2015):
Maybe she has an STD like herpes and is embarrassed.
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A
male
reader, Sageoldguy1465 +, writes (2 September 2015):
 Been there; done that. The woman I dated simply wasn't much interested in sex.... As it happens (in hindsight) she also never told me that she loved me (but, DID day, "I like you A LOT...").
I finally realized that the "relationship" I THOUGHT that we had was really ME having a relationship... and her coming along for the ride..... without really participating in many ways.... We've gone our separate ways, now....
Good luck.....
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