A
female
age
30-35,
anonymous
writes:This ones for the guys...what makes a girl decent for a one night stand? what makes a woman ideal for a relationship?What kind of girls would you consider only good for one night? i'm talking looks and personality.And why do you think that if a girl is dressed a certain way she is easy? if a girl is dressed sexy would you not think shes brill because shes confident enough to show her body and what a body! Thanks
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male
reader, Jmtmj  +, writes (29 July 2010):
 "truly confident women dont have to show off their bodies to know they look good. They dont need that reassurance from men constantly, they know it themselves."
Good point.
A
male
reader, BrownWolf  +, writes (29 July 2010):
You care what people think because you are dressing up just for them?? If they don't like it, don't look. If they like it, then keep looking.
You can dress like a nun and people will still have something negative to say...so?
Misery loves company.
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A
male
reader, Serpico  +, writes (29 July 2010):
Keepers and one night stands are typically mutually exclusive groups.
As to your point about showing skin - whether you like it or not how you dress gives others information about you. If you are showing a lot of skin many will take that as you are craving that kind of attention from men. If you dont like that kind of attention, you shouldnt dress that way.
To your point about "confidence" - I find quite the opposite - that truly confident women dont have to show off their bodies to know they look good. They dont need that reassurance from men constantly, they know it themselves. That is true confidence if you ask me.
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A
female
reader, anonymous, writes (29 July 2010): a one nite stand is usually drunk, cant remember ur name to begin with! A keeper wont give u wot u want first off...she will make u wait
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A
reader, anonymous, writes (28 July 2010): This is verified as being by the original poster of the questionThanks for all responses, it just annoys me that if a girl is confident and likes to show her body off every now and then she instantly is branded easy and attracts all the wrong kind of attention. I'm very far from easy i'm 21 and i've had sex with 2 people both of whom were boyfriends, i would never dream of having a one night stand. But if i go to a club i will show a bit of skin just because i'm confident about my body not because i'm trying to get laid. People associate confidence with relationships but it suddenly becomes a different story when it comes to showing a lil skin-your no longer confident but instead easy. How irritating!!
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A
female
reader, Elydiese +, writes (27 July 2010):
They wont sleep with you on the first night
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A
female
reader, chigirl  +, writes (27 July 2010):
 Dear male anon, love at first sight is not about love for appearance, but being able to see more of who the person is by first look, or first meeting. Being able to see who they are from the first moment, and falling for that. It is not about falling for beauty. Love at first sight can happen to anyone, it is not about looks.
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A
male
reader, Jmtmj +, writes (27 July 2010):
Brownwolf absolutely hit the nail on the head.
"A keeper will not have a one night stand. A one night stand is just that, one night.
There is a song that sums up the kind of sexy most guys are looking for..." A lady in the streets, but a freak in the bed"."
The most exciting part of a relationship is the prolonged chase before it even begins, the tension and uncertainty. Why end that in one night?
Ever heard the old analogy of the cat and the string?? Try dangling, swirling and teasing a cat with a piece of string? It goes crazy trying to catch that slippery little sucker... but drop it on the ground and it'll poke it a few times (hehehe), then get bored and walk off. Same principle with one night stands and keepers.
If a guy thinks you're easy then that really affects what type of guys will come after you to begin with... It also affects whether a guy thinks you're a keeper or not. Cos if he knows you're easy, then others may know you're easy too, he knows this... and easy is not a quality you want in a girl you can bring home to meet the mother. Don't be an easy piece of a... err.. I mean string is my main point.
Of course there are exceptions to this, but that's just my 2 cents.
Best of luck :)
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A
reader, anonymous, writes (27 July 2010): if a bird does it on first minute of knowing you,it is through habit.
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A
male
reader, asap09marc +, writes (27 July 2010):
 from my own experience,chicks who drop em right away often do it whether with someone or not. tried to be open bout it but would any man expect a drunk chick who goes out of her way to av a seeing to is only doin it to you an ur the first an last?
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A
reader, anonymous, writes (27 July 2010): You want the truth? Here you go, for pretty much all guys that do the one night stand thing, it's whatever is available or whatever they can get, literally anything will do as long as the girl is willing.
Obviously attractive is the preferred choice but as the night wears on and if there's little success, then the expectations and standards are lowered to accommodate the need for sex. Alcohol helps with this.
Ideal woman for a relationship is one that doesn't fall into the above category and let herself be fodder for guys that do one night stands i.e. one that doesn't put out on the first date or with some random guy she just met in a club.
Everything after that is either common sense or personal preference.
The above is a broad generalization of course but it's the most common explanation.
*The following are not my views, I don't endorse these but they're relevant to the question*
One night stand looks: Starting with attractive and working down.
One night stand personality: Easy, nothing else, who cares about personality when you just want sex?
*Are my views*
Relationship looks: Personal taste, each guy is different and there is absolutely, categorically no general definition of beauty.
Relationship personality: Personal taste, but in general confidence.
"And why do you think that if a girl is dressed a certain way she is easy?" I don't, I know better.
Something to note though, having your breasts on display doesn't exactly scream 'look at my personality' to guys. It says 'hey everyone, look at my tits'. You can't blame some guys for thinking 'easy', when your attempt to dress as sexy as possible has the desired effect. If a guy was in a club, muscly, topless with a six pack, I don't think many girls would be thinking about his personality either.
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A
male
reader, BrownWolf +, writes (27 July 2010):
A keeper will not have a one night stand. A one night stand is just that, one night.
There is a song that sums up the kind of sexy most guys are looking for..." A lady in the streets, but a freak in the bed".
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A
male
reader, anonymous, writes (27 July 2010): showing skin,most of your boobs,short skirt in a way to attract sexual attraction will get only that.
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A
male
reader, olderthandirt  +, writes (26 July 2010):
 the "perfect' girl in my mind is the one that has an easy smile and a soft heart. can she cook? who cares if she can make you laugh food is not important
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A
female
reader, chigirl +, writes (26 July 2010):
I just thought of something that I found interesting. When I look at the newly-wed pages in the newspapers, the women who get married seem to always be a bit on the chubby side. Maybe guys like to marry round and curvy women because they look like they will be good mothers?
I usually joke about that to my mother, saying I need to gain weight because I hardly ever see a skinny girl getting married.
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A
female
reader, chigirl +, writes (26 July 2010):
Not a guy but here's my take on guys/girls. Any girl/guy is ideal for a one-night stand, as long as she/he is not clingy or looks ugly and are extremely unattractive or plain weird.
A woman/man that is suitable for a relationship is someone who shows a genuine interest in you as a person and what you do, is not afraid to build friendships, show that they are interested in getting to know you better, have charm, and make you laugh.
Some guys, not all guys, think that girls who dress sexy are slutty. They link showing skin to wanting sex. However not all men are like this. Sadly however, many women do dress sexy just to get sex and guys to drool over them. And many dress as if they are proud of their body when most of us wish they would cover it up... All in all: the way you dress can't really say too much about what you want, and many women are oblivious to what message they send out with the way they dress. But, showing skin and dressing sexy does not send of any message of the woman being brilliant or smart. Dumb people can still have style.
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A
male
reader, anonymous, writes (26 July 2010): It depends on how easy going a girl is to be honest, if shes really easy to get, and has decent looks, maybe enough to get attention ( some does this wearing revealing stuff, that also works ) than that is a one night stand. I myself don't believe in love at first sight, looks only help you get attention, nothing more though its not a bad thing to be pretty. For "keeper" it's almost right the opposite, a girl whos fun to talk, respects herself and makes you respect her and a girl you'd definetly talk to more.
If I'm just tolerating the conversation to be able to have sex, it just marks that the girl is a one night stand.
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A
male
reader, Kenj +, writes (26 July 2010):
 For me it’s in the attitude of the girl. If I can see she is sincere then it usually is a relationship and if she is too keen then it’s usually a one night stand.
It has to be mutual feelings though otherwise I would feel as if I was taking advantage of the woman.
Relationships take work from both sides and as such more respect is built up over time. If I am in a relationship then I remain faithful to my partner but I know not all guys do this.
I think dressing sexy has nothing to do with it, sure it can get a girl more looks but remember there are a lot of guys who are perverts (as well as woman).
Contrary to belief guys think about other things than just sex.
A woman who is hard to get shows some form of control and shows she is not just in it for sex.
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