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female
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*andsb
writes: Hi I'm married with 4 kids and love my family to bits, but I'm in love with a married man. I have had feelings for him now for 11 years. As I have gotten older and he has gotten more used to me say, in the last 7 years, he has been flirting with me when he is here as he lives in a different country. I have told him how I feel but he still continues to flirt with me he has cheated on his wife twice before. He was here for a holiday and went home yesterday with his family. I'm gutted and I miss him so much. I never felt like this before and it only seems to be getting stronger. He is now moving to my country to live and bought a house only down the road from me so don't know what to do. I really want to be with him just once to see if my feeling for him are real, as I have only ever been with my husband. I'm married now 7 years and together 12. help!!!!!!!
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Fancy yourself as an agony aunt? Add your answer to this question! A
reader, Mickey_Powell +, writes (24 July 2005):
 You need to understand the people that will be affected by your decision. only you can make the right move but have to realise you may hurt your husband and your children. You have only ever been with your husband, feelings for another man is very common because you have not experienced it before. If you do not have feelings for your husband and have very strong feelings for the other man you should consider telling your husband you are not happy, and explaining to your kids so they are not in the dark!!
You have to think "will this man cheat on me" if he has done it twice before, he is capable of doing it again.
In my opinion you should stay with your husband you seem happy, going with the other man may wreck everything as he might do the same to you... when he moves down the road from you dont give into temptations. Do whats best that will make you happy
Good Luck!!
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